


Where Is Love

by Cecile5410



Category: Queer as Folk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-12-29
Updated: 2013-06-30
Packaged: 2013-08-15 09:05:58
Rating: T
Chapters: 14
Words: 25,510
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8847962/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/4346925/Cecile5410
Summary: AU takes place in college. Michael,meets a certain professor Cameron. At the same time he feels strangely attracted to David's straight brother Ben.





	1. Chapter 1

**Update with some little corrections :)**

**Also, to precise:**

**"..." dialog**

**'...' text message  
**

**_italic _thoughts**

* * *

**Chapter 1 : Michael**

Where the fuck was Brian ? It was almost the only thought who was running through Michael's mind while he was waiting for his best friend at Woody's for half an hour yet. Actually, not the only thought. His eyes were looking everyone in the bar, the guys dancing, the guys in happily couples, the guys almost already in action, and the guys alone, like him if Brian didn't hurry up.

Phone ringing

"Don't tell me you're not coming !" Michael said, picking up his phone.

"Sorry Mikey, something…. came up" Brian answered.

"You were supposed to meet me at Woody's"

"I know, but something totally out of my control just came on my way"

"Fuck you"

"That's the plan, how did you guess ?"

"Whatever. I'll see you tomorrow, don't forget to wake up."

"Have some fun while you're there. It would only do you good."

"Bye Brian, I've already stopped listening to you."

"I know you know I'm right. Have fun."

Well, more time to observe. Observe and drink. After a few minutes, he decided to go to the bar order something to drink. His gaze went on the men sitting on the bar. Men alone on the bar, a species of its own kind. One of these men caught his attention: while all the men alone were drinking, filling their glasses, and drinking again, trying to forget something; this one was just seated there, looking at his glass still full.

"Is there a problem with the glass ?" Michael said to him in a friendly tone.

The man looked up at the one who interrupted his dreaming.

"Excuse me ?"

"You seemed to be in contemplation of your glass. Most of the men, including me, would already have drunk it."

"Oh yes, uh, I learned an upsetting news a few days ago and it's quite hard to live with."

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to."

"So, will you drink that glass ?"

The man smiled and emptied his glass. He then ordered another and did the same.

"You don't do things by half" Michael said in amusement.

"Never. How about I buy you one ?" the man offered.

"Just to keep you company"

"Yeah, we'll say that" and to the barman : " Two more whisky please"

"And you, uh…" he began when he had finished his drink.

"Michael"

"Nice to meet you Michael. My name is David."

"Likewise David."

"So, Michael, what are you doing alone in a bar on a Sunday night looking at the men who contemplate their glasses ?" David asked.

"My best friend was supposed to meet me, but he didn't show up"

"Lucky for me, otherwise I'd still be staring at my glass"

"Instead of being at your 5th … at least"

"I don't think you can say something; these empty glasses at your right speak by themselves.

"Alright alright, but it's your fault."

"I'm pleading guilty, having a companion to drink is much more fun."

Michael looked at his watch, horrified to see it was midnight already. Midnight, his mother would be furious.

"Oh, it's midnight, I'd better go. I wasn't supposed to stay in the first place." Michael said, standing up.

"If you hadn't stayed, I wouldn't have been able to do this." David answered, standing up too. He grabbed Michael's face and pressed their lips together. He slipped his tongue in Michael's mouth and devoured it, leaving Michael breathless when he parted.

"I'll be here, staring at my glass, if you want to come drink with me, and more after midnight." David said, winking, and Michael blushed at what was being offered.

He made his way out and came back home, thinking about the man he just met, David.

* * *

2nd year of college, here he was. Michael thought after his first two hours of class. He took the stairs to go to his next class, on the third floor. French literature. He had to choose an option for this second year, and this seemed to be the less boring. Room 312, at the opposite of the corridor. He was making his way to his room when someone ran into him.

"Oh, sorry, I was looking at the map I had been given. I'm sorry." The stranger said

Michael looked up to see a young man, a little older and taller than him, with blue eyes looking at him; eyes that seemed to read his thoughts.

"It's okay. Are you lost ?"

"Actually, yes, I think so. I have class in room A101"

"I see. It's not this building. You have to get out of this building and enter the one on the right. You take the stairs to the first floor and it will be the first room you see."

"Thank you" the stranger said with a smile that made Michael have a strange feeling in his stomach.

"You're welcome" he replied and went to his own room.

The room was almost full when he arrived and he sat next to a girl who was moving in rhythm with the music in her headphones and had her feet on the table.

"Excuse me, can you move your feet ?" Michael asked.

"What ?" she said, removing her headphones.

"Can you move your feet ?" Michael asked again.

"Can I have your attention ?" a voice that sounded familiar to Michael said loudly. But where had he heard it ?

"Oh, yeah, sure" the girl replied.

"Please, be quiet."

Michael put his things out of his bag and on the table and then lifted his head to see…

"Everyone, welcome to my class. My name is David Cameron and I'll teach you French Literature this year. We'll start with _Au Bonheur des dames_ by Emile Zola, so be sure to bring it. If you have any questions regarding this class, you can ask them now or at the end."

His look went on his students, waiting to see if there were any questions and his eyes stopped on Michael. He smiled.

"Let's get started."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2 : Ben**

Two weeks now that Ben was in Pittsburgh and he still didn't understand why his parents had sent him there. In Portland he had his family and friends and in Pittsburgh… there was just his brother. Well, half-brother who he was now living with. He had befriended Julia, the daughter of their neighbor, who was going to be in his class this year. At least, he knew someone, he wouldn't be all alone.

But right now, he couldn't find his room. Julia had class before him and he was left alone with his map. Where was A101 ? Looking the map more concentrated, he realized he was on the third floor of building B. But where was-

"Oh sorry, I'm sorry" he said to the student he had ran into.

The guy looked up, he had the most beautiful brown eyes he had ever seen and the prettiest lips which seemed to call him to taste them as the guy was telling him where to go to find his room.

After having thanked the brown-eyed student, he did as he had been told and soon he was standing next to room A101.

He tried to think of his first class but his mind always went back on this student and his deep chocolate eyes. What was the matter with this guy ? He wasn't gay, he couldn't be. He had had a girlfriend in high school. He was not gay. He just had to think on something else.

The class was a great way to keep his mind busy and by the end of it, the student was out of his thoughts.

"Hey Ben !" he heard when he was out of the class.

"Hey Julia ! How is it going ?"

"Fine, I just had a class with the 2nd year. And your brother."

"Oh, you're with him. Well, now I just have to wish you good luck."

She chuckled. "I think he's nice. I wish you were in this class."

"No thanks. It's enough I live with him."

"So, how about you ? Have you lost yourself ?" she said with a little grin.

"Uh Actually, yes."

"Really ? Oh, poor baby" she said, a teasing grin on her lips.

"Don't mock me. It's a big college. I had to ask someone I ran into while I was looking at my map."

"Oh it's so like the soapy films !" she said, giggling. "and then what, you asked her out ?"

"It was a boy and no."

_A very cute boy whom I hope to see again_ he thought.

"Actually it's not the one I wanted to ask out." he said. "So, Julia, will you go out with me... on a date ? Tonight 8 p.m ?"

"Sure" she replied, a big smile crossing her face.

She was really pretty, with her playful green eyes, her little turned-up nose and her long curly light brown hair.

The life here wouldn't be too bad after all.

* * *

7.45 p.m. he was early. Early and nervous. After all, he knew Julia only for 2 weeks. What if she said yes just to be nice ?

7:47 p.m. he checked himself in his bedroom mirror. He had nothing to be ashamed about. He had put a black pant and a light blue shirt with the top button opened.

7.50 p.m. He added his ever present leather jacket.

7.53 p.m. He was ready to go.

8 p.m. He knocked at the door of Julia's house. Her mother opened the door.

"Good evening Mrs Johnson." he said

"Ben, hello." she said, smiling.

"Uh... is Julia ready ?"

"Oh, yes, the date." she replied. she got closer to Ben and said : "about time. She's always talking about you."

"Mom, what are you saying ?" Julia had arrived behind her mother.

"Nothing wrong sweetheart" she winked at her daughter. "Have a good evening."

"You're beautiful" he said when they had climbed in the car.

"Thanks" she replied, blushing slightly.

It was true, she had a white fitted top and a dark blue skirt. She had held her hair in a high ponytail and had a discreet make up, just enough to enlighten her green eyes and her face.

Ben had booked in a fancy restaurant and the food was good, as well as her company. She talked easily about everything and nothing and wanted to know more about Ben's life as well. He learned that she was a single child born in Pittsburgh, that her mother had divorced her father and was now living with another man for 2 years who was nice. He had also learned that she loved dancing, classical dance essentially, her passion since 6 years old.

"I was surprised you ask me out" she said as they finished their desserts.

"Why is that ?" he asked, a bit surprised himself

"I thought you were gay."

"What ? ... uh ... why ?"

"I don't know, I just thought, my instinct told me... and your brother is."

"I'm not like him. At all." he said, too roughly.

"but I'm glad I was wrong." she smiled, wishing she hadn't said anything.

He smiled back at her.

An image of two big brown eyes came to his mind and he put it as far away to his mind as possible.

"Anyway, you want to dance ?" he offered as he heard the beginning of a rock n' roll song.

"I don't know..."

"You love dancing, come on." he grabbed her hand and made her stand up. "Come on."

"Fine, I'm coming"

Step back, step left, turn, step forth. That's what was on Ben's mind during the beginning of the dance. And then it became more natural and he had fun, he enjoyed dancing with this beautiful girl. He was proud to have her by his side, proud to show the couple they made to the world.

After a while, they stopped, breathless. He paid the bill and they got out of the restaurant.

They were silent during the trip home. He was wondering if he would kiss her and this thought took the totality of his mind.

"That was incredible." Julia said when they were arrived in front of her house.

"You didn't tell me you were such a great rock dancer." He replied, impressed.

"Well, a girl has her secrets." She winked.

"I'm glad to know one of them, mysterious girl."

"Thanks Ben, I had a great night." She said, arrived at her front door.

After one more moment of hesitation, he stepped closer to her and kissed her. He wasn't surprised when she kissed back.

"I correct, wonderful night." She smiled brightly.

"Sleep well" he said, smiling back.

She entered her house and closed the door behind her.

Ben felt a feeling of delight, he had a girlfriend here, in Pittsburgh, where he didn't want to go in the first place. She was wonderful : a beautiful, smiling, funny and intelligent girl. So why was he feeling bad ? Why was he feeling like something was wrong ? This couldn't be her, having a girlfriend as great as her couldn't be wrong.

"Where were you ?" a voice came from the dark.

He was lost in his wondering why and he didn't see the man sitting on the couch of the living room.

"Christ David ! You scared me ! Did you *have* to sit in the dark ? Lights exist."

"It wouldn't be dark if it wasn't midnight. Where were you ?"

"Out. You're not my mother for god's sake."

"But you live with me. She sent you to me."

"Yeah, I wonder what crossed her mind."

"Oh, I can see it, you were with that little girl. What's her name again, Leïla, Sonia ?"

"Julia."

"Yeah, that's it. Now go to bed, you have school tomorrow."

"So have you."

"But you're 20, I'm the adult here."

"Yeah, like the other day : coming home drunk at 2 a.m is adult."

David gave him his don't-argue-with-me-you're-gonna-regret-it look and Ben knew he has to go to his room.

"Goodnight" he said in a resigned tone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 : Michael**

"You're so pathetic Mikey" Brian said before taking a sip of his beer. Michael had just shared his story, what happened with this David before he became his professor.

"No, I'm not." Michael replied.

"He's your professor."

"I know."

"And he's hot."

"I know that too." Michael replied, finding Brian not helpful at all.

"So what are you not fucking his brains out ?"

"Because he's my professor."

"Go make us a little remake of Grey's Anatomy."

"And because he's not into me, I'm just someone who he talked to, and drank with." he said, not even stopping at Brian's remark.

"And kissed. He told you he wanted to do more."

"He was drunk."

"And you say you're not pathetic. Alright, since you don't want him..."

"Never said I didn't want him."

"Too late Mikey."

"Brian don't !" He said but Brian was already gone.

He saw Brian sitting next to David and asking him something. No one resisted to his best friend, at least Michael hadn't seen anyone say no to Brian. David barely looked at him. It must be his way of being. He wouldn't resist long to Brian. There, now he was speaking. He didn't know what they were talking about but Brian seemed interested.

Michael was lost, he didn't know what to think anymore. He felt attracted to David but he was his teacher and he had some moral bounds, at least he thought he had some.

He chose this moment to go to the toilets, not wanting to see Brian play with his new prey.

Pushing the toilets door, he didn't see that the professor had seen him.

The door opened as Michael was about to go out. It was him, as hot as the last time, but obviously less drunk.

"Why did you send your friend to seduce me ?" David asked

"How do you know he's my friend ?"

"I've watched you since your arrival."

"You're spying on me ?"

"Yes. So why ?"

"Why won't you sleep with him ?"

"He's not my type."

While speaking, David was slowly stepping closer to Michael but the latter was stepping back.

"And what's your type ?" Michael asked.

"Why didn't you come join me at the bar ? I was waiting for you." answering questions by questions, this conversation wouldn't go forth.

"I'm not interested." Michael said, in a tone he hoped convincing. It didn't work since David chuckled.

"I don't believe you." David said, stepping closer. Michael was his back on the wall and couldn't step back anymore.

"You're my professor."

"So what ?"

"I can't. I have morale."

"I still don't believe you. You'll burn in hell because you're a queer, not because you dated your college professor."

"I..." Michael didn't have the chance to say what he wanted. David had closed the remaining space between them and pressed his lips against the smaller man's. Michael's mouth opened in surprise and David took that chance to deepen the kiss. Meanwhile, David slipped a hand in Michael's pants and stroked his growing erection. Michael groaned loudly and fought back the attack of David's tongue.

This is the moment David chose to part and step back.

"Still not interested ?" he said, a wicked grin on his lips.

"Fuck" Michael said, desperate in having David's body against him. He nearly jumped to where David stood and resumed their kiss. David smirked against Michael's lips and pushed him in an empty toilet box.

They closed the door. The sign 'no sex in bathrooms' fell on the floor.

* * *

October, 1st.

Two weeks had passed since Michael had sex with David in the toilets of the Woody's. He began to be accustomed to dating his professor. He was discovering a new face of David, more kind and funny, and he liked this part.

Plus, he liked David's class, he was a great teacher and everyone seemed to like him. Sometimes, David winked or smiled to him during the class and it made Michael blush and feel special.

This Friday class was no exception, he smiled to Michael but looked also at the girl seated next to him. Michael had been a little late this morning because of Brian and his usual seat had been taken. He then had to sit somewhere else, next to another girl. It didn't change anything to him, a girl was a girl.

"So, Good morning class." David said and the class became quiet. "The last time, I talked about a homework, a presentation you'd have to do with a partner. Well, since the class is full and we have an even number, you'll work with the person next to you."

Michael turned to the girl next to him and she did the same.

"You are first group, second, third..." David said, pointing at the students.

"First, you'll work on the image of the woman in the book. Second, you will work on the relationships between the employees. Third, the life of an employee in this magasin, you can reduce to the life of Denise at work. (...) And fourteen, the evolution of Denise's and Octave's relationship. All of this subject to answer a question, how is Au bonheur des dames showing the 'Grands magasins' ? and how is this book typical of French literature of the 19th century ?" David said, telling each group his subject. "I'll come to talk to you more about what you have to do."

"We didn't have the most difficult." Michael said to his classmate to start the conversation.

"Yes, I guess. When do we have to talk to the class ?" she said, putting an agenda out of her bag.

"I don't know, I don't think he said it."

"So, I think we should part the work in a few parts and then meet to put our parts together and discuss our presentation. When are you free ?" she said, already thinking of what they could do. She seemed like an always-moving, always-talking girl. Michael didn't felt at ease with this kind of person.

"Michael, Jenna." David said while coming next to them.

"Actually, it's Julia." she corrected him. Michael was sure David knew it perfectly.

"So, you're at ease with your subject ?" David asked as she hadn't said anything.

"Yes, I have already plenty of ideas for our presentation." she began before Michael could open his mouth. David smiled at the expression on Michael's face. "we could follow her career, at the beginning when she was at the bottom of the scale, and then when he notices her and at the end, married with him."

"Well, we can clearly see the leader of your couple." David said in an amused tone.

Julia smiled shyly and a little embarrassed.

"Alright class, 4 p.m., we're done. See you Tuesday." and to Michael, but enough loud for everyone to hear : "Michael can you stay, there's something I would like to discuss with you."

Michael stayed seated while the class emptied. When everyone had left the room, David closed the door and Michael stood from his seat.

"Wow she just can't stop talking." he said.

"Yeah, I know." David said with a roll of his eyes.

"You know her ?"

"Kind of, she's my neighbor."

"Oh okay."

David pushed Michael against the wall, his arms on each side of Michael's body.

"God, I've wanted to do this for 2 hours." he said in a low voice.

He captured Michael's mouth in a hot and passionate kiss. He moaned when Michael bit his lower lip and he stepped closer, grinding his body against Michael's.

"Oh, me too." Michael said when they parted.

"You want to see my house ?" David asked.

"I would love to." Michael replied with a wink.

"Do you like the book ?" David asked when they were arrived in front of his house.

"Is this the professor talking ?" answering questions by questions had become their game.

"Why ? do you like the professor's talking ?"

"So this is your house." Michael said when they were in. It was a modern and simple decoration.

"Yes, but you didn't answer my question."

"About the book ? Or about you teaching me... things ?"

"You love being taught, don't you ?" David asked in a tone that said he wasn't really talking about school.

"Mmmh maybe." this time it was Michael's turn to take possession of David's lips.

They were cut by someone clearing his throat. "Hum... Hello"

David parted and turned his face to the disturber.

"Oh you're here." he said.

"Yes. So are you." he replied, looking at Michael. Michael was looking back at him as well. It was the guy who had ran into him the first day. Oh, small, cruel world.

"Uh... Ben this is Michael. Michael, this is Ben, my brother."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4 : Ben**

Ben could hear them, talking in the living room; David and a man. He was curious. Since he had arrived in Pittsburgh, he had never seen any of David's boyfriends or one-night stand. But with a boyfriend, David wouldn't be much on his back.

Plus, the second voice sounded awkwardly familiar. Deep inside him, he knew where he had heard this voice, but he wouldn't believe it.

He walked down the stairs and saw them, the happy couple kissing feverishly.

"hum... hello" he said. David turned to him and said "oh you're here."

And that's when it happened. He saw a smaller man behind his brother. With brown eyes. Brown eyes. Holy mother of God, the same man who he was always thinking of, the same brown eyes that haunted his mind since the first day, the same lips he wanted to taste the first day were on his brother. Impossible. No, it couldn't be. And now he was staring at the guy as David introduced them to each other. Michael then, Michael. He had finally a name.

Michael walked towards him : "Nice to meet you. Again." he said, smiling.

"Likewise. Again." Ben answered. "Well, um... I will leave the two of you alone and get back in my room."

He walked back to his room and locked himself in. He lied on his bed and stared at the sky. He has a room under the roof and the ceiling was just a very big window. That was a thing he loved. Being connected to the sky in direct line. Watching the blue sky and the clouds moving, watching he dark sky with all the stars and letting his mind wander. A bunch of questions were attacking his mind. Why was this guy he saw once moved him this way ? why was he interested in a man at all ? What did it mean ? His mind was too messy to answer properly. _Breathe,_ _breathe_. _There, calm down. _He said to himself.

He wasn't interested in him at all, of course he wasn't. He always knew he was straight. He liked girls. But with this man... no he was just curious, to know him, like friends maybe.

The conversation he had with Julia about their first time came to his mind. He had made a move but she had stopped him, and talked for a long time.

_"It's our first time, at least mine. and I don't want it to be screwed. it must be perfect and I don't know if I'm ready." _

_"I know, I know. I'm not pushing you in any ways."_

His thoughts were cut by David calling him from downstairs. He stood up, walked out of his room and walked down the stairs.

"About time, this is the fourth time I call you." David said when Ben entered the living room.

"I have a life. I don't have to run like a dog when you call me." Ben replied, annoyed as always by his brother's attitude.

"Whatever. I forgot I had a professors meeting and I have to go. So you can drive Michael home..."

"Or he can stay." Ben finished, wishing Michael would say yes.

"Stay. Yes, I would like to." Michael said and smiled to the brothers.

"Well, I have to go. See you later." He gave Michael a quick kiss on the lips and made his way to the front door.

Ben and Michael sat on the couch.

"Well, it's funny seeing you here." Ben started.

"It is ?" Michael asked.

"It's a funny coincidence. Seeing in college and now here."

"Yeah, I guess. So, finding room A101 wasn't this difficult, was it ?"

Ben smiled, remembering how lost he was.

"Not after you explained me. You're in 2nd year ?"

"Yes, I am. And you ?"

"3rd year, but I'm new in Pittsburgh."

"Where were you before ?"

"I lived in Portland with my parents and suddenly they decided I would go live here."

"With your brother."

"Yes. He's my half-brother actually. We have the same mother. She remarried my father after having divorced his father. He's 7 years older than me." Ben explained. "And how about you ? I didn't know David was the type of professor who sleeps with his students."

Michael blushed and Ben thought he was adorable when his cheeks turned to red.

"No, we met in a bar 3 weeks ago, the night before the beginning of the classes. He was alone and my best friend had just told me he wouldn't come so I talked to David. At midnight when I had to go, he kissed me."

Ben looked at Michael, waiting for him to continue and wanting to hear the entire story.

"I was more than surprised to see him the next day, as my professor. I didn't want to date him because he was my professor and I had been taught it was a bad thing. When I returned to the bar, he was there again and we had... a discussion."

"Aaah so it's because of you he came home late." Ben teased.

"I guess, I'm sorry." Michael said, looking down

"Hey I was kidding" Ben said more softly.

They talked for an hour with never a moment of silence, always finding new subjects of conversation. Ben was amazed at how easy it was to talk to Michael, how much he loved talking to him, how they were close already. Ben looked at his watch and was surprised, he had lost track of time.

"Oh I'm sorry, it's late and I didn't even offer you something to eat. Are you hungry ?" he said, standing up.

"Starved." Michael replied.

"I planned to make burgers. You like that ?"

"Of course I like that." Michael said with a smile, following Ben in the kitchen. "Wait, *make* burgers ?"

"Yes, I make them myself. They are much better hand-made than in fast-foods. My opinion."

"So you can cook, it's great."

"Yes, I'm the cooker here. David likes good food but won't cook." Ben said with the same expression he always had when talking about David. "Do I have organic burger bread, steaks from the butcher, salad, tomatoes, cheese, and gherkins. Do you like gherkins by the way ?"

"I like it a lot." Michael answered.

"You can cut the tomatoes if you want." Ben offered, for Michael not to be bored.

"Knowing my dexterity, I would cut one of my fingers instead." Michael said, half-joking.

"Oh come on, it can't be that bad. It's just a tomato." Ben said, while taking the steaks out of the stove. They were perfectly cooked.

"Someone wants to eat blood." Michael said and Ben laughed. He felt so comfortable with this man.

"Oh, this reminds me I have ketchup that I made. This will replace the tomatoes, your fingers are saved."

Michael burst out if laughter. "I wonder why talking about blood reminded you of your ketchup but okay."

_His laugh is adorable_. Ben thought. He took back control of his mind. Adorable ? What was he thinking seriously ? He took the burger breads and put the steak, cheese, salad, gherkins and ketchup and finally another burger bread on top.

"It's ready, let's eat." Ben said, grabbing the two plates and heading to the dining table. They sat at the table and began eating.

"Mmh... it's the most delicious burger I've ever eaten." Michael said, a smile on his lips and a look of amazement on his face.

"I'm glad you like it." Ben smiled back. It was true. He knew the man for only a couple of hours and he already sensed that Michael's opinion mattered to him.

"Seriously, it's amazing. The ketchup is too."

"Oh it's nothing, just some blood." Ben replied trying to sound serious.

"Whose blood ?" Michael asked, playing the game.

"I'll keep it as a secret." Ben winked.

"It's amazing" Michael said with another bite in his burger. "I should come here to dinner."

Ben smiled at the idea, thinking how it would be like to have Michael with him all the time, all evenings at least.

"Yes, you should." Ben replied, sounding a little too serious this time.

With this last bite, Michael had ketchup left on the right side of his lips, on his cheek.

"You have hum... ketchup on your face." Ben said to him.

"Where ?" Michael said, a little embarrassed.

"On the right side."

Michael ran his tongue on his lips but didn't succeed in getting the ketchup away. He tried again but didn't succeed neither.

"There, allow me." Ben said softly. He reached his thumb and brushed it against Michael's cheek, where the ketchup was. Their eyes met. Michael blushed. Ben quickly looked away, not wanting to be trapped in the depth of these chocolate eyes.

There was a moment of silence while they finished their burger and it was Michael's turn to be surprised by the hour.

"Oh shit, it's already 9, I have to go home." he said and Ben stood up with him.

"It's dark, I'll drive you home." Ben said, in the middle of an offer and an order.

"Thank you." Michael replied, accepting the offer.

They got dressed and went out of the house. Ben locked the front door and turned to go to his car.

"Ben !" a voice was calling him out.

"Julia." he smiled to her. She was just getting out to add something to the garbage.

"You were supposed to call me." she said, feigning to be offended.

"Oh yeah I remember, I'm sorry. I was busy, it went totally out of my mind." Ben replied, sorry.

"Oh, it's true, David told me you were neighbors." Michael said to Julia. Ben looked confused. _What ? _Michael sensed his confusion and added "we're together for a homework in David's class."

"Ah okay. Well, we should go Michael." Ben said, feeling embarrassed by the two of them.

Michael climbed in the car. Julia came by Ben and put a kiss on his lips.

"See you tomorrow." she said before going back to her house.

Ben climbed in the car and got in the way of Michael's house.

"You're kissing your neighbors now ?" Michael asked, in an ironical tone.

"She's my girlfriend." Ben said with a smile. He could not see the look of horror on Michael's face.

"... Your what ?" Michael asked loudly, not believing his eyes and ears.

"Girlfriend." Ben repeated. He then turned his face to look at Michael and saw an upset face.

"What is it ?" he asked.

"Nothing. Absolutely Nothing." Michael replied.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5 : Michael**

"_Michael, do you promise to love, respect and cherish Ben and be his true and faithful husband ?"_

"_I do."_

_I have this smile on my face. On the corner of my eyes, I could see my mother giving tissues to Emmett and Ted and It made me smile. Well, smile is a weak word, I was irradiating. I was smiling so brightly that I believed I shone. I always felt special when I was with Ben, even after all this time._

"_And do you Ben, promise to love, respect and cherish Michael and be his true and faithful husband ?"_

_Ben looked me in the eyes. God I loved his eyes. Blue, intense, magnificent. When he gave me that look, I felt like the most important person in the world. And with that look, he always succeeded in reading my mind. I was so in love with him._

"_I do."_

"_If anyone knows a reason why these two people should not be joining in marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace."_

_Brian made a move towards me to tell something but he received a warning look from my mother and abandoned the idea._

_Ben had broken our visual contact to take the ring. I watched his hand while he was putting that gold metal circle on my finger. It was more than a bit of metal, it was the sign of our eternal love, of our commitment and our devotion to one another._

"_Now by the authority of the province of Ontario, I pronounce you to be legally married."_

_Knock knock knock_

_When he leaned in an kissed me, it was like he hadn't kissed me for years._

Knock knock knock

(October 2nd)

Michael was woken up by someone knocking at the front door. He felt good, he felt in love.

He got out of his room and down the stairs. His mind was clearing up. It was just a dream, a stupid dream. He must have figured out. And wake up. But no, he didn't want to wake up, this dream was too beautiful and it seemed so real. He felt loved and in love. Not that David was not making him feel that, he was perfect, but something wasn't right, and he didn't know what.

He opened the door to see Ben. His mind was suddenly very clear and he remembered all: their encounter, the burgers, and his girlfriend. He was straight. Michael could have sworn he wasn't considering the way he act with him.

"Uh… Hi." He said to Ben.

"Hi. Sorry to come here like that but I had an argument with my brother, again, and I wanted to go out."

"Yes, of course, I understand. You want to come in ?"

"Sure, thanks." Ben answered, looking at Michael. It reminded Michael of his dream, his eyes were magnificent, and they were led on him. _Don't stare at him, you're not in your dream_. Michael said to himself.

"Am I interrupting or bothering you ?" Ben asked when they were in the living room.

"Not at all, I'm glad you came, I was asleep. I work on Au Bonheur des dames before being killed by Julia." Michael said in a joke tone but he sensed that the mention of Ben's girlfriend had frozen the atmosphere.

"Uh… yes… sorry about that. I should have told you." Ben said, embarrassed.

"That you have a girlfriend ? Why should you have told me that ? I was just surprised. Just like when you saw me with David."

Ben had a surprised look on his face. "Come on, don't think I didn't see it." Michael added.

"Alright, I was surprised, but you looked like a thief caught red-handed." Ben replied, a playful smile illuminating his face. Michael loved this smile, it was him that provoked it and he loved it.

"Excuse me David and I had plans. Plans that we had already started by the way."

Ben put his hands on his ears and an horrified expression on his face. "Don't want to know about it." He said, half-serious.

"Of course you do. Deep inside of you, you want to know if your brother is good in bed."

Ben burst out of laughter and stared insistently at Michael.

"What ?" Michael asked.

"I look at you, I'm concerned for your sanity." Ben responded.

"Thank you, *I* am good with myself." Michael retorted before realizing he sounded very critical.

"What do you mean ?" Ben asked, sensing that Michael wasn't speaking of the same thing.

_Shit, watch your mouth !_ he admonished himself.

"No nothing." There was a moment of silence before he started again "anyway, do you want a piece of pie ? My uncle is here for a while, he's a baker. This is the best pie you'll ever eat."

"Yes please."

They were silent during a few minutes and then naturally came back to a fluid an animated conversation.

"I don't want to kick you out but uh…" Michael started when he eventually looked at his watch. He wondered how to tell Ben he was meeting his brother. Ben seemed to read his mind since ha said "but you have plans, of course, I'll leave."

They stood up and walked to the front door.

"Thanks for the pie, you were right, it was excellent." Thanked Ben.

"I'll bring some when I'll have dinner at your place" Michael said, smiling.

At the moment, the door opened and Michael's mother entered.

"Hi honey." She said to Michael with a kiss on the cheek. She turned to Ben "Hi, I'm Debbie, his mother."

"Ben, very pleased to meet you." Ben answered.

"He's more of your age this one. She said to Michael who blushed.

Michael didn't dare looking at Ben in the eyes when he responded "No Ma, we're friends. I'm still with David."

"He's my brother actually." Ben added.

"Speaking of the devil." Debbie exclaimed as she saw her son's boyfriend. Michael opened the door to welcome him.

"Hi, you're ready ?" David said to Michael smiling. He leaned in and kissed him. When their lips parted, David took conscience that they were not alone.

"Mrs. Novotny." he greeted Debbie.

"Call me Debbie, I'm not that old." She exclaimed.

David smiled at her and turned to his brother.

"What are you doing here ?"

"I wasn't aware I had to inform you of all my actions. I was going back anyway." Ben answered.

"Well, we shouldn't be late." David said, looking at Michael.

"Yes, right." Michael responded while getting out of his house. "See you later Ma." He said to his mother.

"Don't come home too late." She said back.

* * *

"So, what are we gonna see ?"

"I thought of 'The King's Speech', I heard it was great. It has only good critics." David said and Michael already sensed that we wouldn't watch a lot of this film.

"Otherwise, there is Iron Man 2." Michael proposed, but knowing too well what David's answer would be.

"It'll air on TV. Do we take Kit-Kat Ball ?" David said when they had their tickets, changing subject.

As Michael expected, he didn't really watched the film. He had tried, but the story of a stammering king wasn't interesting at all. So he ended up eating Kit Kat Balls and distracting David by kissing him which made the latter half-happy, half-annoyed to miss parts of the film.

At about half the film, Michael's phone vibrated in his pocked.

Text from Brian.

'Babylon tonight ?' - B

'Can't.' - M

'Romantic evening with the professor or passionate night with his brother ?' - B

'With David.' - M

'Come with me, I'm sure you're bored.' - B

'No, I'm not.' - M

'So then why are you talking with me ?' - B

'You asked me.' - M

'Ok, see you tomorrow at Babylon.' - B

'I didn't say I'd come tomorrow.' - M

'Too late.' - B

Michael watched the last part of the film and understood that they all lived happily ever after, the king did not stammer anymore. Michael thrust his hand in the packet and took the last Kit-Kat.

"You took the last one ?" David asked him after having found out that the packet was empty.

"Oops" Michael answered with a devilish smile. He rushed putting it in his mouth.

"Is this an invitation ?" David said with a seductive look. He didn't wait for Michael's reply and kissed him full on the lips.

"Thank you." He said when they parted. "I got my Kit-Kat back" he continued, showing it in his mouth.

Michael laughed and kissed him again.

"Come on Cinderella, back home before your mother change us into pumpkins."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 : Julia**

October 18th

"Ju can you come downstairs ?" Julia heard her mother say.

"I'm coming Mom" she replied.

It was a Saturday in the late afternoon and she was studying this project on the French book. Much to her surprise, Michael was doing his part, and it was not bad; dating the professor was not bad after all. They had met just once to talk about it and work. She was sure to be an open and nice person to everyone but with him, she just couldn't; she sensed him kind of a threat for her couple. When she went out for the garbage two weeks ago and she saw him with her boyfriend, she felt something weird, a strange feeling in her stomach. They didn't do anything but she felt this thing, and she kissed Ben. It was childish and foolish but she couldn't help it.

Jealousy. Yes, that was it. She was jealous. No reason, Ben was her boyfriend, she loved him and she believed he loved her. They were great together. But then why was-

"Julia !" her mother repeated.

She went downstairs to find her mother and John seated on the couch.

"Ah, you're here. We have something to tell you." Her mother said.

"Okay" Julia replied, sitting down on the couch opposite to her parents.

"We're going to get married." John said and watched her face to see how she would react.

"He proposed me." Her mother added, showing the ring on her hand.

A smile crossed Julia's face as she said "I thought you would never do it John."

"We can't hide anything from you." He replied, smiling.

"When are you planning the marriage ? I want to organize it, Oh I already have so many ideas."

They laughed at Julia's excitement. "Sweetheart, I don't know if…" began her mother. John put a hand on his fiancée's arm and looked at her, they exchanged a look and he nodded.

"All set, you'll do it. It's a family affair."

"Wow, really. This is going to be so much fun." Julia was impressed. She didn't think they would trust her with that. With their wedding, it was such a responsibility. She was already imagining herself in a gold dress with a shining white band around her waist and shoes with ribbons running up her legs, walking up the aisle, Ben at her arm. Ben would be meeting her father and they would get along just well.

"We were thinking of December. We don't want to wait until summer and I've always dreamt of getting married under the snow. It leaves time to plan things and we will help you of course." Julia's mother said, making her leave her daydream.

"Yes right. Well I have to return upstairs now, I want to finish what I'm doing before meeting Ben." Julia said, standing up.

"Oh, where are you two going ?" her mother asked with a knowing smile.

"We're invited for dinner at Michael's house. Well, Michael's mother invited David and Ben as he's his brother and then Ben invited me." Julia explained. _True, what am I doing ?_

"Great. Go prepare yourself honey, you will shine." Her mom said.

Julia turned and went back to her bedroom.

* * *

An hour later, she was rather happy with her work. Out of the shower, she had a hard time picking up her clothes. Casual ? Formal ? A mix of the two ? _I can't, this is not my family, I don't know them, and I was not even invited at first. I don't have anything to do there, I can't, I_-

"Julia ?" Ben was here, he had entered her room.

"What ?" she turned to see him. What was he doing in her room ?

"I knocked but you didn't respond so I figured I would just enter." He said, looking slightly embarrassed as he looked at her.

_Oh God, I'm in underwear_. She blushed hard and looked around frenetically for something to put on.

"Don't." he said. He stepped closer to her and took her hands. "You're beautiful."

They stayed a moment like this and then she decided to say:

"… You'd better go, it's not polite to be late."

He didn't seem to understand what she was talking about. "I won't go." She added.

"Why ? Are you sick ?" he said in a concerned tone.

"No, I'm fine. It's just that it's your dinner, I have nothing to do with Michael's family. I don't belong there." She explained, a little panicked.

"You belong with me. And they want you there, Michael told me to invite you. This is not a business dinner, we are going to have fun." Ben said, trying to reassure her.

"But…" she began to reply.

"No buts. Don't I have the right to show my lovely girlfriend to the world ?" he asked and she felt a pride feeling at his words.

"You just don't want to be alone with David" she teased.

"There's a bit of that too." He admitted, laughing.

"Alright, I'll come."

"Yeha" he said, making the V of victory sign with his fingers. He leaned in and kissed her softly. She was crazy about him, he was just perfect. "I'll wait for you downstairs." He walked to the door.

"Wait, I have something to tell you." He turned around to look at her. _Just say it : I love you. I love you. I love you. _"John proposed my mother." _You're such a chicken, girl._

"Oh great !" he exclaimed.

"Told you I have an instinct for things." She said, with a proud smile.

"I will get downstairs now and congratulate them." He passed the door and closed it behind him.

She picked a few clothes of her closet. Light grey jeans, and a sweater black on the front and grey with shining flakes on the back and the sleeves. She made a sided braid of her hair. She picked boots with heels and got out of her room.

As she was walking down the stairs, she heard her parents and Ben talking pleasantly. _This is right, we are meant to be together._

"There you are." Ben said, noticing her presence.

* * *

They arrived at Michael's house right on time. They were welcomed by Michael. As they entered the house, Julia was able to take a look at the people present there. There were David standing near Michael, a woman in the kitchen who she assumed to be Michael's mother and a younger man who was putting the plates on the table and who probably was his father.

"You're late." David said to his brother.

"We're not." Ben replied.

"What were you doing at Laura's house all this time ?"

"Who ?" Ben replied. Julia saw that he wasn't going to let go this time. She couldn't understand either why David didn't like her and always had to mistake her name.

"Her." David said, designing Julia. "The woman you love." He continued with a devilish grin. _Love ? had he said he loved me ?_

"Are you all going to stay here all night or will you come for dinner ?" they heard Michael's mother say, preventing Ben from responding at his brother's attack.

"Yes, true. Come here." Michael said, gesturing at Ben and Julia. "Let me introduce you to my mother, Ben you've already met her."

His mother looked at Julia "You're the girlfriend, aren't you ?"

Julia nodded. "Julia. Nice to meet you Mrs. Novotny"

"Please, I'm not married, don't give me that pleasure. Call me Debbie."

Julia's look went to the younger man coming by them. Debbie caught her look and explained

"He's my brother Vic."

Julia exchanged greetings with Vic as Debbie returned to the kitchen.

They all sat at the table. Julia was seated between Ben and David. She will have a hard time preventing the two of them to fight. That may be why Michael had told her to sit there. Michael was himself seated opposite to David.

"Vic made the diner, so if it's disgusting, it's his fault." Debbie said, coming with a plate.

"Thanks sis." Vic said, smiling at Debbie. "So it's vegetarian lasagna made with asparagus and peas." he explained.

"It looks delicious." Julia said, and she meant it. It looked and smelled delicious.

"I bet it's delicious if it's as good as your pie." Ben said. _What pie ?_

"Oh then it's you who ate all of it ?" Vic answered with a smile.

"Actually it's me but he helped." Michael said. and the strange feeling was back. They had been together alone.

They started eating and it felt like the most amazing lasagnas she had ever eaten.

"You have to give me the recipe. I'd like to try it sometimes." Ben said.

"*You* do the cooking ?" Debbie asked. She seemed a little surprised. "I thought you would do it David."

"Everyone knows gays are better cooker." David said looking at his brother with a wicked grin.

Ben was caught in a loud cough that didn't seem to come to an end. Everyone looked at him but no one understood what was going on between the two brothers.

"Screw..." Ben began.

"Do you work in a restaurant ?" Julia asked, preventing Ben from insulting his brother in front of everyone. She had eventually understood that David had said Ben was gay. It was a current thing with him, and she didn't like that. It wasn't because he was gay that his brother had to be gay too.

"Yes, in New York."

"You live in New York ?" David asked, interested.

"Yes, but I come here each year to see my family."

There was a loud knock at the door. Michael stood up and headed to the front door.

"I lived in New York for the first 6 years of my life. But then my parents divorced and... anyway." David said, lost in his memories. "I know well New York, I went to live with my father when I was 18 and it's fascinating. Even if my time was filled with bars and nightclubs." he winked.

"Oh yes, where did you live ?" Vic asked.

"Who cares ?" a man she had seen once or twice but couldn't remember the name said.

"Brian, shut up and sit down." Michael said to him, bringing a chair for his friend to sit next to him.

Brian, yes, now she remembered, the more than arrogant friend of Michael. She wondered how Michael could be friend with someone like that, they had like, opposite temperaments.

"I love when you take control Mikey." he said, winking.

She heard Debbie whispering to Michael "What is he doing here ?" and Michael answering in the same tone "Jack."

A sad look crossed Debbie's face but soon she took back control of her expressions and plastered a smile on her face.

"Give me your plate honey, I bet you haven't eaten." Debbie said in a maternal tone.

There was clearly something going on here and they seemed to accept the fact that this guy came to their house just like it was his home. Then she caught David's look, and was very surprised. He was looking at the friends speaking with the same look she had when Ben talked to Michael. Jealousy ?

"So how is this work you have to do ?" Debbie asked, in an attempt to start the conversation.

"It's great, we are doing very well." Julia explained.

"Thanks to Mikey's cleverness, he's dating the professor." Brian looked at David with a look of sheer disdain. "I bet he taught you a lot of things."

"That's none..." Michal began

"of my business, I know." Brian cut him in a bored tone. "But I speak the truth." he finished.

"Well, who wants dessert ?"

* * *

One hour later, everyone had finished the desert and David went in the kitchen to help with the dishes. She was in an important discussion with Ben -and then Michael joined- about the fact that she will be the one to organize my parent's wedding.

"Who wants coffee ? David asked from the kitchen. As everyone said that they glad would like one, Brian stood up. "It's Babylon time. I suppose you're not coming Mikey." he said, in a half-interrogative tone.

"No he's not coming." David said while bringing the two first cups of coffee, with a cold look at Brian.

"Would you *please* mind your fucking own business while I'm talking to my best friend ?" it wasn't a question this time. By the way Michael was looking at Brian, Julia could already say that David would lose if he started a war with Brian.

Brian looked at Michael, waiting for an answer. "I'm not coming." Michael said with a roll of his eyes.

"Fine, see you tomorrow." and he leaned in and kissed Michael. On the mouth. Julia's jaw dropped at the sight of them kissing. What was Michael doing ? Cheating in front of his actual boyfriend ?

David's situation was worse, he had clenched his fists in an attempt to contain his anger which was nevertheless obvious.

Ben took Julia's hand to make her look at him and stop staring.

"You're okay ?" he said, attentive as ever.

"Yes, everything is great. Though they have a strange sense of the word relationship."

"Pretty special indeed." he chuckled.

"Coffee ?" he asked as many cups were now on the table.

"Yes, please."

Michael had accompanied his friend to the exit and was now back in the living room.

David put a cup of coffee at Michael's place on the table. He started to put sugar in it but Ben stopped him. "No" he said.

"What ?" David replied, his hand still holding the sugar above the cup.

"It's milk and *then* sugar." Ben explained, grabbing the milk and putting some in the cup. "Now sugar."

David was clearly annoyed by his younger brother lecturing him.

"You know ?" Michael said, looking at Ben, impressed.

"Of course." Ben smiled. Julia thought he was so attentive with his friend. Okay, she was trying to believe he was just being attentive as a friend. He was still perfection.

* * *

The diner was over and Ben and Julia were back to her house. They went upstairs, careful to make no noise. They wouldn't want to wake up Julia's parents.

"So how was it ?" Ben asked when they had closed the door of Julia's room.

"Great." she replied, absent while taking off her necklace and earrings.

He stepped closer, looking at her. "What is it ?" he asked.

"Nothing." she smiled, hoping it would be enough to convince him.

"it's not nothing if it worries you." he replied softly. Damn, how was always so sweet ?

"I'm wondering about your relationship with Michael." it was something she'd wanted to tell for days, she wasn't sure now was the right moment but too late anyway.

"I don't understand." he replied, looking confused.

"You two look very close."

"Yes, as friends." and then he seemed to understand. "Oh you mean in that way. No, absolutely not. I'm with you."

"And if you weren't ?"

"Then I'll be trying to be with you. There's nothing to be worried about."

That's what she wanted to hear. He seemed to always know what she needed from him. She believed him, she really had to work on her fears. She was lucky her boyfriend was this comprehensive. Because saying to a man that he's attracted by another is a couple suicide.

"All I want is to be with you." He added.

This was it, the right moment. _Just say it, don't be afraid._

They were standing facing each other.

"Ben I…" she began, he looked in her eyes and seemed to find what she wanted to say but he didn't say anything. "I love you." She finally said.

He opened his mouth to say something but at this very moment, his phone vibrated. He looked at it and then put it on the table.

"Sorry, it was a text from David. I turned off my phone now." He went back to facing her and she kissed him. No matter what, she was in love with him. She put a hand on Ben's shirt and unbuttoned the top button. As she lowered her hands to do the same with the second button, Ben grabbed her hands to hold them still.

"Julia. What are you doing ?" he asked

"I thought it was what you wanted. You don't ?"

"I do, but I thought you wanted to talk."

"Enough talking." She said and as he wasn't moving or talking she added "This is a conscious decision, I'm sure."

She freed her hands from Ben's and unbuttoned the second button and this time, Ben did nothing to stop her. Instead he kissed her and this kiss wasn't like any of the kisses they had exchanged. They parted lips so that he could remove Julia's sweater. And they kissed again while undressing each other. No rush, it was their night.

Later, much later, the moonlight embraced in a halo of light the happy sleeping couple curled up together in bed.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7 : Ben **

_"Found them ?" I asked while entering the bathroom._

_Here he was, the man who in a few days had found his way straight to my heart. And now he was half-naked in my bathroom, looking for condoms. How did I get so lucky ?_

_"Found them." Michael said blankly. He had this expression on his face, I could see it because I knew this expression too well. It was a mix of sadness and fear. It was an expression I wished I would never see on Michael's beautiful face._

_I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, reassuring myself with his smooth skin under my fingers. I stroked his arm up and down and kissed his neck, the back of his neck, his shoulders. I wanted him to retrieve this loving, lustful expression he had 10 minutes ago. I looked up to see his face in the mirror, to see his eyes, the most gorgeous and expressive eyes I had ever seen. They reflected every feeling he had, I loved particularly when he was pleased or happy and he had that little spark that illuminated the brown in the most beautiful way. Not to mention they were so deep I could get lost in their contemplation. I was falling head over heels in love with him._

_Then he looked up to meet my eyes. and all the love I had couldn't fight against what was in Michael's eyes. Because his eyes were blank, no expression, no sparks. I knew it was going to hurt when he spoke._

_"I can't do this. I thought I could, that I could handle it, but I guess I was just fooling myself." he looked down again and added : "I'm sorry."_

_It was like someone had ripped my heart off my chest and I _screamed.

November 21st

"Ben, wake up, wake up !" he heard. He was shaking and nearly crying. He took a few very deep breaths to calm down before opening his eyes. His eyes found Julia looking at him with evident concern.

"You had a nightmare ?" she asked.

"I don't know, it was a very strange dream." he looked up at her and then at the clock on the bedside table behind her. "I'm sorry, it's 7 a.m. go back to sleep." He said in a sleepy tone.

He didn't think he had gone back to sleep but when he woke up the next time and looked at the clock, it was 11 a.m. and Julia was no longer in bed. Since Michael's dinner two weeks ago, they sometimes came to each other's house and spent the night there. He had also caught Michael at the breakfast table some day, his relationship with David was going forward as well.

Ben took a moment to think about his dream. He didn't understand, why was Michael in his dream ? A dream so real that he was left with a strange feeling of déjà vu. It wasn't the first time he made a weird dream like this, he had dreamt about his wedding with Michael once. This déjà vu feeling was really frustrating.

He got up and got down the stairs. Julia was sitting on the couch, looking at some wedding magazines she had brought.

"Hey !" she said, standing up to kiss her boyfriend. "You went back to sleep after all."

"Yes, I guess."

The bell rang. He heard David talk with the guests.

"Happy Birthday !" she said smiling.

"Oh thanks, I had almost forgotten." He said, leaning to kiss her.

"Ben, this is not a way to be dressed in front of a woman." He heard his mother's voice say.

"Yes, mom." He said, from habit. He took a few seconds to realize what he had just said and turned around. His parents were there, really there.

"Mom, dad !" he exclaimed, surprised.

"Happy Birthday !" his father said enthusiastically.

He crossed the living room to say hello to his parents.

"What are you doing here ?" he asked. He was happy really to see them but he was wondering why they had crossed the country.

"Come on, don't be so surprised, you knew." His father said, disconcerted.

"No, but I'm happy that you're here." He answered, smiling.

His parents turned to David with an accusing look.

"Whoops" David said, though not looking sorry at all.

"We would highly appreciate if you could convey what you are told, David." His father said. Well, a fight, it had been a long time. Ben could see, looking at his father's face, that he was not pleased at all.

"Everything you say ?" David answered.

"Don't get smart with me." He warned.

"It seems to me that I'm already taking your son in my house, Robert, and I have things to do, other things than watch him all day." David answered in a cold tone.

"You should have done it. Conversation over." His mother said. She noticed Julia who had stayed silent since they had arrived. "You're Julia, aren't you ?"

Ben had a moment fear that David would come up with another name for Julia but thank God, he didn't.

"Ben talked about you." His father said, winking at Ben.

"Go get dressed honey, we'll get to know Julia."

Ben was happy, no other words, that his parents were there with him. He hadn't seen them for a long time. He was happy to be in this familial ambience again. But he hoped David would not be… him, actually, arrogant and provocative.

When he was dressed, he went downstairs and found them all sitting at the table, ready to eat.

He finally spent a nice time. They avoided all the tensed subjects and even David seemed to appreciate.

At the end of the meal, his mother left the table and came back a few minutes later with a small box.

"Happy Birthday." She said, giving the gift to Ben.

It was a watch, beautiful watch with his initials inscribed on the back, B.B.

"You won't forget the hour like that. And you'll remember not to stay in your pajamas at 11 a.m." his father said.

"Thanks, it's beautiful."

"My turn now, open it." Julia had brought her gift too.

_De Profundis_, by Oscar Wilde.

"Oscar Wilde, wow, just what I wanted to read. Thank you."

"I know well you wanted to read it." She teased.

"What, have I talked to you about it ?"

"I wouldn't say 'talk', I would rather say something like talking frantically." She stepped closer to kiss him, which he gladly did.

"Oscar Wilde, wasn't he… uh…" his mother began.

"Yes." Ben answered, knowing what his mother meant, and what she would say. He got up and brought the dessert plate back in the kitchen to avoid the discussion with her on his literary tastes.

While he was in the kitchen, he heard a voice, which undoubtedly was Michael's.

"Thanks for your support." … "I know, but I had a dream about it, it was really weird." …. "Wait, I'm in front of the house. Talk to you later."

One minute later, the bell rang. He opened the door and was therefore not surprised to see Michael standing outside.

"Hi !"

"Hi, come in." He greeted Michael.

"Happy Birthday, I guess." Michael said, smiling.

"Thanks, you guessed right."

"I brought you something. I hope you'll like it." Michael said, giving the box he had in hand to Ben.

Ben opened the box to find a Buddha statue. He had always felt attracted by spirituality and Buddhist philosophy but he didn't talk about it.

"You're supposed to rub his belly for luck." Michael explained.

Ben did so, making a wish.

"It's… perfect. Thank you, it's so nice of you." Ben said, delighted by his presents. They started towards walk to the living room.

"Michael." David said, walking towards them.

"Hey, I came to bring Ben his gift and ask you if you wanted to go out somewhere." When David was by their side, Michael kissed him without hesitation. Ben didn't know if David would have rejected Michael or kissed him back if his mother hadn't interrupted.

"David !" she exclaimed in a severe tone. Michael stepped back and blushed for embarrassment. "I thought this teenage whim was over."

"It won't be over, mother, this is who I am." David responded in his teacher tone. As if his mother had made a mistake and he was correcting her.

"You can't find the woman you need if you continue to do things like that." Robert added.

"Firstly, I didn't ask for your opinion, since you're not my father. Secondly, what's the problem ? That I'm gay ? That I'm dating one of my students ? That he's 19 ? Or maybe that we slept together in the classroom ? You already have one perfect straight son, two would be boring, no ?" David said, his voice so calm that it was almost frightening.

"You could be normal if you wanted to." His mother said in an encouraging tone.

"I don't want to be *normal*." David said, and then he turned to Ben. "You haven't opened my present by the way." He took something from one of the drawers of the living room bookcase and gave it to Ben.

"Sex for dummies ?" Ben exclaimed, more surprised than ever.

He could have pretended he found that funny. Until the moment he saw the shape of two men holding hands on the front of the box. Okay.

* * *

**~David~**

Michael couldn't stay the night and David was not happy with it. Michael was 19, he could decide whoever he wanted to spend the night with.

"Goodnight honey." David's mother said to Ben.

"When do you leave ?" He asked. Poor child, his parents are leaving him.

"Tomorrow, by noon. We'll have time to say goodbye before your classes."

She kissed him goodbye and he turned to go upstairs with Julia.

At this moment his mother let out a cry and almost passed out but her husband catches her before she hit the ground.

Ben ran by his mother's side.

"Mom, are you okay ?" He asked in his most worried voice.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Don't worry sweetie, I just slipped on something." she replied, forcing a reassuring smile.

"Go to bed, it's late." Ben's father added.

Ben obeyed and climbed the stairs.

David knew what was happening to his mother and he didn't want to see it. As he was walking to the stairs, he heard the two talking.

"Are you alright ?" Robert asked.

"The doctor told us it would happen, but I wanted to come to see my sons anyway. What if it's the last time I see them ?" She explained.

"Don't say that. We don't care about the statistics, the cure will work." Robert said in a broken voice.

"Ben couldn't survive. He's only 20."

"That's why you sent him here." Robert answered.

"Why did you send him here ?" David asked, coming back in the living room. The parents had obviously not seen that David was still here since they looked up in surprise.

"For him to have a good life, to have a student life, like any other young people."

David sat down at the table, opposite to them.

"But he's not like any other people, his mother is ill."

"He doesn't have to know that. You can't say it to him." She answered in her don't-argue-with-me tone. But David wouldn't let go.

"So you take the decision for him." He stated.

"Mothers do that." She answered in that same tone.

"And what's the next step ? You will put cushions were he walks, you will chew his food for him to make his life easier ? Life isn't easy, mother, and you don't help him by doing this."

"All I'm asking you is to keep this to yourself. Don't say anything to him, please." She said, softening her tone.

"I won't, since it's what you want, but I don't agree with what you're doing." He stood up and get up the stairs for good.

He spotted Julia standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"You parents haven't told you that eavesdropping is a bad thing ?" He said to her.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8 : Michael**

November 26th

"Did anyone tell you sleeping with the teacher before the test was not a good thing ?" David said, lying on the bed, catching his breath.

"I'm already going to hell for being a queer, remember ?" Michael replied, turning on his side to see David.

"I'm willing to go to hell if I can have morning sex like that."

"I gladly agree. I hope the beds are conmfortable there." Michael smiled and got up the bed, and headed to the shower, still naked. "Get up, professor, you don't want to be late for my presentation."

"I hope it's worth it." David said with a growl as he got up.

As the hot water fell on him, Michael began to sing. He had an horrible voice, that was for sure, but he felt like singing anyway. Because he was happy. He was allowed to stay at David's for the night. and actually, the only fact that he had a boyfriend to spend time with made him happy.

As he got out of the shower, he wondered why his mother hadn't called yet. Five minutes later, he heard a ringtone and grabbed his phone. _I should have kept my mouth shut ! _

"Hi ma !" He said, sure that it was his mother.

The conversation was mainly composed of "yes, ma !", "yes, ma, I'm up.", "Yes, I'm going to school." and "yes, David is going to school too." and finally "Bye, ma." Michael had gone down the stairs while talking to gain time.

"Hi !" He said, noticing Ben, who was still in his pyjamas; well, pyjama pants. He was going back to the kitchen.

Ben turned so fast that Michael didn't see anything. "Wh-... Hi... Uh-sorry I thought you were already gone."

"Don't worry I'm practically gone." Michael replied with a knowing smile and a long look at his boyfriend.

"What ? No, I'm not going with you. It's too early for a teacher." David replied. Michael could almost see David stick his tongue out at him.

* * *

"You're ready ?" Julia said when Michael arrived in the classroom.

"Hello to you too. How are you ?" He replied. _Oh oh,_ he said to himself, _looks like David is rubbing off on me._

"How do you think I am ? We are presenting today and you don't even come in advance."

"Calm down. Look, he's not even here yet." He replied, setting the chairs by the desk although he knew they would stay up.

The chairs were final used to sit while waiting for David to arrive. Which he did ten minutes later.

"Hello." He said loudly. His natural authority made the class fell silent, as always. "So, today we'll be listening to our last group. You can as usual ask about points you don't understand or just questions you want to ask but write them and keep them for the end. Don't interrupt the presentation." he made a pause in which he seemed to think at what he had just said. "But I've already said that many times, 13 actually, so I'll stop there. Michael, Julia, let's go." He smiled to them and went to sit at a table in the middle of the class.

Michael started talking, as they had planned. Because she had said that she wanted to take the last part and he didn't care speaking firs. like that he would be free after and would just have to listen to her and look interested.

"At the very beginning, Denise arrives at St Lazare Station without any money. She is hired as saleswoman in the department store Au Bonheur des dames. The department store which will expand throughout the story and replace the small shops. The owner is Otave Mouret. He is rich, elegant, imaginative, seductive, intelligent. Therefore, he attracts women. He also contemptuous for women but they love him anyway, most of them are attracted by his money."

_Don't you dare giving me that look_. David was looking at him as if he wanted to cross the room and take him on the desk. Let's say it, he was eye-fucking him.

"He has a mistress Henriette Desforges, whom he uses to approach the Baron Hartman who can and will give him financial support. His behaviour with women makes one of his assistants to say to him : "Un jour en viendra une qui vengera toutes les autres".(1) This woman is Denise."

Alright, so maybe Michael had done it too in class once or twice but David was being cruel to do this now, when he was talking.

"She is very poor, she has to pay off her brother's debts and she has hard living and working conditions with the 13-hour workdays, the individualism, gossips and jealousy from the other saleswomen. But when Mouret makes advances to her, she refuses and he asks "is there a man in your life ?" and she answers "no, there's too many women in yours." He decides to try harder because he wants her." Michael said, and it was the end of his part.

As Julia started talking, he took discreetly his phone out of his pocket and hid it under the desk. He had done it thousands times, Brian had taught him in high school all the cheating ways he knew.

'Stop giving me that look.' - M

Julia started talking about Denise's personality and her side in the relationship.

'What look ?' - D

'Like you want to fuck me here and now.' - M

'You didn't complain this morning.' - D

'Maybe I was simulating' - M

'I don't think so ;)'- D

At this point, it was obvious to everyone that David was texting, his phone was on his table and he was grinning at it. David was so bad at doing two things at the same time. _He must have been the perfect student at school._

"Are we disturbing you Mr. Cameron ?" Michael said, when Julia made a pause in her speech. There were a few giggles at Michael's acting like the teacher, and everyone turned his head to see their professor.

David looked up, caught out, completely surprised.

"Not at all, go ahead." David replied, hiding his phone.

Julia resumed her speech, it was nearly the end.

'Bastard.' - D

Michael looked at his own phone and just gave David a wicked smile.

"Thank you." David said when Julia stopped speaking. "Good presentation."

When everyone had left the class, David came by his desk where Michael was packing the things.

"Why was that ?" David asked, looking frightening, but Michael knew him too we'll to be afraid.

"You were enjoying this far too much. And you can't cheat haha I wonder if you were student one day." Michael smirked. "I know why you became professor by the way."

"Oh, why ?"

"To control people. It was quite cool to have the power here."

"I like having the power and abusing young 19 year-old students." David gave him his seductive look.

"I can see that."

"So, you're coming back with me tonight ?" David asked.

"I can't. Have to help my mom or something." Michael replied. He knew it wasn't true but David was always put in a bad mood, almost angry when Michael talked about Brian. Lying was bad but he wasn't lying to cheat on his boyfriend, just to spend time with his best friend. So it wasn't a real lie, was it ?

"Okay, see you later then." David said with a little smile, though he sounded a little disappointed.

"Of course." Michael smiled, and with a kiss on David's lips he was gone.

* * *

"I know, Ma. Can I go now ?" Michael asked, ready to go out of the house and meet Brian.

"I'm doing the late shift, I'm not home neither. Where are you going ?" Debbie asked with a suspicious look.

"Nothing special, just out." Well, it wasn't the real truth, but he didn't want to argue with his mother one more time about going in nightclubs and the influence of Brian.

He got out of the house after having promised his mother he wouldn't come home too late.

When he arrived in front of Babylon, Brian was waiting for him almost patiently.

"Let's go Mikey, it's devil night." Brian said when he was by his side.

"Devil night ?" Michael asked, curious to know what night the nightclub had invented this time.

"See by yourself." Brian replied when they were nearly inside.

Hell. That was the word. There were flames along the walls, red lights, and gogo boys dressed in devils. They went straight to the dance floor and started to move in rhythm with the music. Michael liked that, dancing with Brian, being close to his best friend.

After a while, Brian put yourself in 'hunt' mode.

"Him ?" he asked to Michael who followed his gaze.

"Oh, no." Michael answered and Brian resumed scanning the room.

"Him ?" Brian asked again.

"You could but you won't be pleased."

"Or him ?" the 3rd was the one.

"Yes, this one." As soon as Michael had finished his sentence, Brian left to capture his new prey.

Michael went by the bar and drank a beer, watching the effects of the devil night on people. He had to admit that this theme was a success, unlike the 80's night.

Brian eventually came back from the backroom.

"You were right Michael, I don't know what I do when you're not here." Brian said to him, dragging him back to the dance floor.

"You fuck the three and after you decide that the third is the best."

Brian didn't answer and kissed him instead. After a few minutes of dance – Michael had really a problem with time in here – he saw Brian staring at someone.

"Mh Babylon class." Brian said.

Michael turned to see what his best friend had stared at and understood what he meant.

_Is it David ?_

David

What the fuck ?

Hell was the word.

* * *

(1) : a day will come one who will take revenge for all the others.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 : Ben**

November 27th

"What ? You have to go ?" Julia was trying to contain her anger.

"What is it ? Don't I have the right to go ?" Alright, he knew it wasn't the right thing to say but he needed some air.

"Of course you have the right. As well as you have the right to spend all of your time with Michael. Or the right, and you use it damn well, to rarely spend time with me. You're choosing him over me, I should have known." Julia was letting out all the anger and frustration she had kept inside of her all this time.

"It's not even a choice to make. Don't go all dramatic on me." Ben retorted.

"I am dramatic ? Don't make me-"

Ben's phone rang and he took it out of his pocket.

"Hold on, keep this for later."

Julia was so surprised she couldn't say anything.

"Dad ?" Ben asked when picking up the phone.

"Hello, uh... I have something to tell you."

"What is it, Dad ? You sound bad."

"Your mother is in hospital."

"What ? Why ? Is she alright ?" Be was confused. All anger from his argument with Julia was washed away by an intense feeling of panick and fear.

"She's ill. They don't even know if she will..." His father couldn't find the courage to finish his sentence. Ben's heart broke at his father's broken, desperate voice.

But he didn't understand, his mother wasn't ill, he had seen her not so long ago.

"What ? Since when ?" He asked.

"For a few months. I'm sorry, I have to go back to the room. We'll talk when you arrive."

"Sure, dad." He said, and he hung up.

He turned to Julia. "My mother is ill." He said, and this was the hardest thing he'd ever said.

"I know." She said. And a few seconds later, her eyes widened at what she had just said.

"Excuse me ? You knew ?" Ben exclaimed, eyebrows raised in surprise and incomprehension. This was definitely not the answer he expected.

"No, no, I didn't know." She answered but Ben didn't believe her.

"Don't lie to me !" We'll, hello back, anger.

"I can't lie to the king of liars." She retorted. "I'm not lying, I didn't know. When your parents came for your birthday, I heard a conversation."

"And what did they say ?"

"They said that she was ill and they asked David to not say anything to you."

"And you kept this to yourself ! That's exactly the right thing to do when you learn thg your boyfriend's mother is in bad health and he doesn't know !" He said, in a loud, angry and a bit ironical tone.

"I didn't know what to do, I shouldn't have hears that." She answered, trying to explain herself.

"I understand David didn't tell me, that doesn't surprise me. But you, I trusted you, how could you do this to me ?"

"Good, you're happy now you have something to yell about. If you're not happy here, you can always complain to Michael."

"That's exactly what I will do for now on."

"Oh yes ?" she asked, though she had heard well.

"Yes. But now I need to see my mother."

"You don't have to come back here." She said as he made his way to the front door. Ben saw that she was holding back her tears and trying to not break in front on fun but he was too angry and sad to care.

"I won't."

And these words were the last he said to her before leaving.

The last he said before being in front of his father, in the hospital. Well, he had had to open his mouth to say no to anything the hostess proposed to him on the plane, but that didn't count.

He also had to tell David that he had nothing to say to him but that doesn't count neither. Because his mind was only filled with the thought of his mother. And the his father's sentence "they don't even know if she will..." If it was that bad, why did they hide it to him ? What if she died ? What would he do ? He was only 20. Tears began to come to his eyes and he wanted nothing but to be hold by his mother. She would stroke his hair and tell him everything would be alright. Tears rolled down his cheeks and he couldn't hold them, it was too hard. He didn't like being the center of attention but right now he didn't care sobbing in a plane.

And there and then, David made the most surprising gesture. Ben was accustomed to David arrogant remarks, selfish actions, but definitely not to that. Because David took him in his arms. Ben's mind was too confused and he needed that hug from someone so much that he didn't push back. It made him cry harder.

"I- I don't want her to die." He said between sobs.

"I know." David answered. "I know."

He didn't have the strength to just notice what happened during the rest of the flight. But when the plane touched down in Portland, Ben was calmer. His eyes red, his heart heavy, but he was calm.

In hospital at last, he headed to the receptionst's desk.

"Excuse me." He said, and the smiling blonde looked up. "Hi, we're here to visit Mrs Bruckner. Could you tell which room it is ?"

"Yes, sure." She typed on her computer before answering. "Room 242. You take the lift right here to the second floor."

"Thank you."

They headed to the lift and he pressed the button 2. He tried to mentally prepare himself for what he could see in this room.

David was being incredibly silent. So silent that Ben wondered if what had happened on the plane was real. Or if the brother-like act of David was a dream.

242. Breathe.

* * *

**~ David ~**

He pushed the door and entered. In the large bed lay his mother, she looked pale and skinny but she was still there, he could hear the bip-bip of the machine. Sitting on a chair next to her was her lovely husband.

"Dad ?" Ben said to his father.

The said father got up and gave them a weak smile. He looked, let's say it, like shit. In all this years of living with him, David hadn't seen him look bad once. He was always the well-dressed, well-behaved, demanding, man David disliked. It was not the same man who was standing in front of him.

He was stooping like he had to carry all the misery of the world on his shoulders. His eyes were red and he looked like he hadn't sleep for days.

At that moment, David was ready to accept that the man really loved his mother, he was maybe not just a family breaker. David had had this feeling on the plane earlier too, when Ben had started to cry. His brother had always irritated him, the perfect boy, favorite of their mother. But he had learnt to live with him and to know him, even against his will; and seeing him as affected as he was by their mother's health had made David think. What if he had been wrong all this time ? No, he didn't have the right to say that, he couldn't, it wasn't true. He couldn't let himself feel this kind of things.

He couldn't think properly about this with all the things that were in his mind at the moment. He had to deal with his mother lying on that hospital bed, and the guilt that was killing him. Anger had been driving him once again. He had wanted to give Michael a book forgotten at his place but Michael wasn't there. Neither was his mother. He had immediately deduced that Michael was with Brian. And Anger and jealousy had taken control of him. And what the fuck had he done ? He had done what he used to do when he was angry and upset before meeting Michael. Clearing his mind in some bar or backroom. He shouldn't have...but... too late. It was just a stupid mistake, he couldn't let that destroy his relationship with Michael.

"You're arrived." Robert said. Ben went by his father to hug him.

"What do the doctors say ?" David asked, looking at his mother.

"They operated her but they said there was a huge internal bleeding and she had lost a lot of blood. They maintain her in artificial sleep because she would be in too much pain if she was awake. They also said it was the reason why they didn't operate earlier because it was too risky, but that now they didn't have the choice." Robert explained.

"But..." David and Ben said at the same time. David let Ben continue.

"But will she wake up ?"

"They said that if she survived the critical 48 hours, she would live." He finished and then sat back down on the chair next to the bed.

"Why the h-" Ben started. He stopped because even if he looked desperate, his father will still not allow swear words. "Why didn't you tell me ?"

"You have to live your life."

"Let me do what I want with my life." Ben said. It was the first time that David heard Ben say this, contradict his father.

But David had enough of this fight. There were more important things to focuse on.

"Stop, there's a woman fighting for life here." He said.

They sat in chairs next to the bed and waited.

* * *

**~ Ben ~**

David was right, they had to stop arguing like that.

OH, wait, had he really said David was right ? Something weird was happening.

Anyway they waited for the critical 48 hours to be over.

At 1 a.m., when Ben was half-asleep, the monitor started to make bip-bips faster and faster until it was an uninterrupted noise. Then nurses and doctor rushed into the room and they are not allowed in anymore.

They waited in the corridor for what seemed to Ben like an eternity. An eternity before a doctor got out of the room.

"Her heart stopped, it is tired of fighting hard but-"

"Are you saying she won't make it ?" David asked. That was him, he couldn't wait for anything.

"We succeeded in making her heart beat again but she's quite unstable." The doctor finished.

_12 hours remaining to wait._ Ben thought while going back to the room.

He spent all this time seated on a chair next to his mother's bed, arguing occasionally with David and thinking about so many things that his head ached. He only left the room to get something to eat at the cafeteria.

The first hour, he just stared at the monitor, as if to warn it to not make that uninterrupted noise and to not show that straight line again. When he was reassured by the regular bips, he relaxed a little bit on his chair.

At the third hour, his head started to ache from all the thoughts and by the fourth hour he had lost track of time.

When a doctor, the same actually, walked in the room, Ben looked at his watch and then at his mother.

"We're at 49 hours, I say she will survive." The doctor said and he went to do whatever he had to do to wake his mother up.

Ben smiled, he freaking smiled. His father was smiling too and David - well, we can't expect him to smile.

Ben nearly cried when she finally opened her eyes.

"Emma, Emma we're here." Robert said and a little smile appeared on her lips.

"Mom" Ben said. She turned her head and looked at him in surprise.

"Wha..." She hadn't yet the strength to speak.

"I called him- them." Robert answered. He continued before she could open her mouth. "We can't do this anymore, this is not right. What if you hadn't survived ?"

She said nothing but nodded.

During the following four days she slept a lot and gained back her forces.

Ben stayed at his parents' house, but he didn't know if he could call it his home anymore.

When he walked in the hospital room this morning, his mother welcomed him with her serious look. He had already missed a week of classes and she was well aware of it.

"Do you like living in Pittsburgh ?" She asked. The image of Michael appeared in Ben's mind like an answer to her question. He should have been thinking of Julia but he couldn't. And with the break-up, he had no reasons to.

"Yes." He simply answered. "Why ?"

"I realize how unrealistic of me it was to think you could have a proper life at thousands miles from your parents." She explained.

"What are you saying ?" Ben asked, a bit lost.

"I shouldn't have done that... But if you're happy in Pittsburgh, then I'll let you go back."

"I think I would like to go back, now that I know you'll be alright."

"I'll be alright. You can go back to your classes, you already missed a week... And to Julia." She smiled and Ben didn't have the heart to tell her the news, not now. "Actually, you both have class." She added as David entered. David rolled his eyes, he hated when people said he had class when he was the teacher.

"Isn't Michael's birthday party on Saturday ?" Ben asked, remembering what Michael had told him.

"Yeah, it is. He won't be happy if we're not there. And I have to go back, I still have students." David replied and Ben noticed the 'we'.

"I'll stay here a day or two before coming back. I'll be in time for the party, I think." Ben said.

Spending time with his parents actually did Ben good. He had missed them, even though he had now a life in Pittsburgh. Well, he had an ex girlfriend, a possible crush on a guy and fights with his brother, but it was his life.

He was happy his mother was safe and sound. The doctor said she had to take pills. Pills with serious side effects, but she was alive.

Ben received a text as the plane was about to take off. From Michael.

'You're coming tonight ?'

He had the time to reply before he was asked to turn his phone off.

'I'll be there, maybe a little late.'

* * *

**Explanation / fight of David and Michael in the next chapter**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10 : Michael**

"So, what are you going to say to him ?" Brian said, picking a mini sandwich in the plate.

"Brian, don't eat that, everyone has not arrived yet." Michael said.

Brian ate the one he had in hand and looked at Michael, waiting for an answer. Michael didn't know what to say, what were you doing at Babylon ? but he had been there too, with Brian.

"I don't know."

"What do you think he was doing in Babylon ?" Brian said, as if it were evident.

"I don't want to believe this." Michael replied, but what other thing could his boyfriend do alone in Babylon ?

"Hey birthday boy" Michael heard and he turned to face David, he hadn't heard him enter. He didn't have the time to answer because David's lips were on his five seconds later. It felt good, kissing always did feel good, feeling wanted.

He didn't want to worry, worry was bad. Maybe the explanation could wait. No, it couldn't.

"I'm happy to see you too." They heard Brian say and David left Michael's lips to step back.

"Brian." David turned to him with a fake smile.

"How are you since... the last time I saw you ?" Brian asked. Michael glared at him and Brian just left the couple.

"Your mother is fine then ?" Michael said, trying to pass over the uneasy feeling.

"Normally." David replied. "It is a serious matter and she might be unstable for the rest of her life."

They stared at each other for a moment and Michael could see that David was torn. Was he going to talk first ?

"Michael, I... I need to talk to you." David finally say.

"In the kitchen." Michael pointed out the kitchen, an isolated place to talk.

"You weren't at your home the night before I had to fly to Portland." David started.

"What ? Is that why you were in Babylon ?" Michael asked.

David looked surprised, as if this answer wasn't at all the one he expected.

"You saw me ?" He asked, trying to understand. And then the realization seemed to strike him. "Wait, you were there too ?"

"Yes." Michael replied. "And before you say anything, I'm sorry I lied. I shouldn't have done that, but look at how you become whenever Brian is mentioned. You would have accused me of things and I just didn't want to fight because I'm happy with you and I didn't want to argue over nothing."

David nodded. He just nodded. That was unusual. Michael kind of expected David to look at him gravely and tell him he was disappointed or even yell at him. But his eyes were just sad. And Michael remembered that his boyfriend had to explain as well.

He looked at the guests talking in the living room and returned his gaze to David. He was about to ask but David took the hint and started talking. Here we go.

"That night you told me you were home with your mom. And you had forgotten a book at my place so I figured I'd just pass and give it back to you. But your house was empty. And I'm jealous, I can't help myself and it's driving me mad sometimes, like...this time." David sighed.

Michael almost said _I know, I told you_. But he let David continue instead. He was dying to hear the story, because Brian was right, he knew it but he had to hear it from his boyfriend to actually believe it.

"And then it kind of took me over. I went to Babylon, I used to do this before. I know it's the worst habit I have." David continued. Michael couldn't imagine him being a backroom VIP resident like Brian.

"And... I went to the backroom, and...-Do I really need to say this ? If you saw me there, you must have an idea of what I did." David said, uneasily.

"Yes, you need. I have an idea, indeed, but I waited and I hoped that you would tell me how foolish I was to think about that, that you wouldn't do that to me. But that's not what you're going to tell me, right ?" Michael felt the anger rapidly growing up in intensity.

"I'm sorry..." David said again. "It doesn't mean anything."

"How comforting it is for me to know that ! You chose to fuck with a stranger and it means something to me !"

"I'm sorry Michael, I'll say it a hundred times if I have to... But you lied to me too..."

"Yes, I lied, because, for some obscure reasons, you can't bear my best friend. I didn't fucking cheat on you ! It's not my fault if you can't stand being away from me for just one night. Now you will be able to do that every night if you want. How great !"

"I can. I can, it was a mistake and I won't do it again, it was a mistake."

"After all, I was just another stranger who spent more time with you than the others. But eventually, you have to change."

"You're the one I want Michael. You were never just another stranger. I want to be with you." David took a step towards Michael in an attempt to be convincing about what he was saying.

"But I can't ! I don't trust you anymore. You fuck around at the first occasion." Michael stepped back.

"You make that sound like I've done this plenty of times. I just slept with someone once. I don't even remember his name !" David argued.

"And you won't remember mine neither because we are strangers and when you're bored with one, you move on to another." Michael retorted.

"You're mistaking me with Brian." David snapped.

"Get out of my house."

"We're not done with this conversation." David protested.

"Oh, we're done with everything. Get the fuck out !"

People were watching them since Michael had started yelling and the house had fell silent.

David finally obeyed and walked to the front door. Michael headed to the stairs and his room.

"Mikey you're..." Brian began to say when Michael passed by him.

"I'm not fucking pathetic !" Michael shouted.

"That's not what I was gonna say." Brian replied, slightly annoyed at being yelled at. But Michael was already gone and hadn't heard.

The talking resumed in the living room as Michael entered his room.

His mother knocked at the door a moment later but he told her to get lost. He would have to listen to her lecture about how he should speak to his mother but he was too angry to care now. He was shaking with rage and wanted to punch something, or someone actually.

Time passed and the anger was slowly fading away, still present but mainly replaced by sadness, and hurt.

He had been a fool to think someone would want him and only him. How had he let himself believe this crap. And now he was alone, and he always would be. He didn't want to be alone, he wanted to fall in love, maybe even to get married if a law was to pass, and to be happy in a big, beautiful house.

There was a knock on the door, again.

"I told you..." he began to say to the person outside he knew was his mother, or Brian maybe. He was still laying on his bed, staring at his bedroom ceiling.

"Michael."

Michael's stomach twisted a little at the voice. It wasn't the person he expected but instead it was the person he wanted. Ben.

"Come in." Michael answered, not moving from where he was.

"Hi." Ben said. Michael was too tired to move but he sat down anyway because he wanted to see Ben. "I'm a little later than I expected."

"It's okay. This party sucks anyways." Michael stated.

"Why ?" Ben asked, stepping closer to the bed. "Michael, what happened ?"

"Nothing, I'm fine." Michael assured.

"You're crying." Ben said and Michael could see the worry and sadness in Ben's eyes. Why did he care ?

"I'm- I'm fine." Michael repeated, but he had to pause in the middle to let out a sob. Not at all convincing.

And then Ben sat down next to Michael. He leaned back against the bed head and wrapped an arm around Michael's shoulders, pulling him into an embrace.

"What are y-" Michael began to ask in surprise and in a bit of protest, but mostly in surprise.

"Shut up." He was cut by Ben's firm, soft voice.

Michael didn't actually want to protest and he couldn't. He sighed and leaned his head on Ben's shoulder. It felt safe and secure and... just good. And he cried again. Because he had been betrayed, because he was confused. Ben probably expected him to say why he was like that but he couldn't, he wasn't ready to put it into words.

Ben stroked his arm up and down soothingly. "It's going to be all right." He whispered. They settled better on the bed so that they were laying on their back. Michael could feel Ben's heart beat. Why was it beating so fast ?

The rythmic heartbeat made him calm down and, for a moment at least, all his worries became insignificant.

* * *

_"Em, what were you looking ?" I said, turning to see Emmett rubbing his feet. _

_"At him." Emmet replied, indicating someone standing near the enter._

_I turned back on my seat to see what, or actually who had caught Emmett's attention._

_Oh. I think I spent the next few minutes staring, maybe even ogling at the man. Because wow, he was gorgeous. More than that, there should be a world for more than gorgeous._

_I heard Vic and Emmett play the game again._

_"Gay or nay ?" Vic said and Emmett considered the stranger gravely._

_I was only partially paying attention to what they were saying, I even stopped eating, because my attention was somewhere else._

_"... I'd say straight." Emmett stated. "Michael ?" Right, now he wanted my opinion. _

_If it was only for me, I would say gay because of all the possibilities. A man can dream. _

_The stranger looked up from the comic book he had in hand and his eyes landed on me._

_Our eyes met._

_Oh. God_._ I think my heart just stopped._

Michael woke up in the early morning and felt a warm body beside him, and this wasn't David. Shit, David, the break-up, all was coming back in his mind now. And also the fact that he had fallen asleep in Ben's arms.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11 :**

* * *

**Ben**

* * *

_That was the weirdest night of my life._ Ben thought while going out of Michael's house and practically running to his own, well, David's. he had taken Michael in his arms, because he was crying, that was a good reason. And then Michael had fallen asleep and he had let him, he had even stayed the night with him. What was the reason this time ? Because he wanted to, it was incredible, he had never thought it could feel so nice. That's why it was weird, and confusing.

But the nice feeling had been replaced by other things the moment Michael told him. _David cheated on me_. Ben's heart ached. How could his brother do that ? And to Michael ? He was the most incredible young man. Ben couldn't believe David had been so mean. If he had Michael, he would never let him go. _Wow wow what am I thinking here ?_

He was so angry at David. And hurt, hurt like he was the one who had been cheated on. But it was Michael, Michael had been hurt. And Ben was going to enter the house, David's, and make him explain.

He unlocked the door and entered. The house was silent, he wondered if David was even here. But then he walked further into the house and he finally saw his brother. David was sitting at the kitchen table, staring at his bowl of cereals. He looked up from his bowl to see me.

"Where were you last night ? I was worried." He asked.

The image, the memory of Michael heartbroken appeared in my mind.

"Oh, you were worried ? But it's something you do, going out all night without anyone knowing." Ben said ironically.

"Why the hell did you do that ?!" He exclaimed loudly as David hadn't answered.

"That's none of your business."

"You've hurt Michael. He's my friend. So this is my business."

"Oh, I see." David said, standing up. "So you broke up with Julia so that you can fuck with my boyfriend... Why do you always have to steal the things I have ?"

"He's not your boyfriend." Ben corrected, ignoring the thing about Julia and the thing about him stealing things; because what was that ? He didn't steal anything.

"Yes, he is."

"Um... let me think, he said, and I quote 'everything is over.' "

"I will win him back."

"I don't think so."

"And why is that ? Because you love him ?" David scoffed.

Ben was stunned. "I don-" but he stopped, he couldn't say it.

"He will never love you." David said, the anger and pain making him nasty.

And Ben lost it, it was beyond his control. He'd never wanted to hit his brother as much as he wanted now. His fist made contact with David's jaw before his brother could step back.

"I was right, wasn't I ?" David said, rubbing the right side of his face. He was making it obvious that he wanted to laugh.

Ben decided to say nothing and to get out of here. He couldn't understand David's attitude, one day he acted like a brother and the other day like a complete asshole. But why was he so angry at him ? David's relationship with Michael was none of his business. He shouldn't care that much. Yeah, he shouldn't. But he did. He did care for Michael. And even if David was rude and mean, he was right about one thing ; Ben cared for Michael more than for a friend, but did that mean he was in love with him ? He was so lost.

He went upstairs in his room. He thought of going to see how Michael was or sending him a text but he decided to give the man some space.

* * *

**Michael**

* * *

Tuesday.

Four day left of classes. Monday had gone quite good but or because Michael hadn't really paid attention to teacher and classes. His mind was far too busy. He was acting like his body was on autopilot mode. Walking from class to class, sitting somewhere, and thinking. Thinking about David and the fact that he was now single, and Ben, because the man confused him and he wanted to figure out why. Ben had stayed the night with him, what kind of straight guy does that ?

Speaking of straight, Michael noticed Julia seated next to him. What was she doing here ? She was in third year. But yet they have one class together. Oh shit. Michael's head snapped up just when David entered the classroom. He hadn't really thought about seeing David in class. How stupid of him, considering it was the place they met. Well, technically, the Woody's was the place they met, but still. Michael saw that the right side of David's face was slightly bruised and looked painful if David trying to not have facial expressions was any indication. What had happened to him ? David turned his face to him and Michael quickly looked away. It was hard enough as it was, no need to add eye contact to that.

"Are you ok ?" Michael turned his head to the girl next to him, Ben's straight cute little girlfriend.

"Why ? Don't I seem to be ok ?" Michael asked. Even if he was avoiding looking up, Michael could feel David's gaze on him.

"You're pale as if you had seen a ghost."

That was pretty much the case. "I'm fine." He said so that she would simply leave him to his thinking.

"Okay." She replied just as the bell rang.

"Alright, hello." David said, settling his book and notes on his desk. "Since this week is the last week before your exams, I suggest we use the time we have to revise all we did in class." he sat on the edge of his desk and scanned the class. "Starting with the beginning, who wants to summarize the book, to tell us what it is about ?"

The class came eventually to an end and the word to describe it was... boring. It took Michael a minute to realize the class was over. He got up and quickly put his book and notepad in his bag. He hurried out of the room to avoid any interactions with his ex boyfriend.

Wednesday.

"I swear Brian, if you tell me to go talk to him or anything I'll strangle you." Michael warned his best friend.

"Don't be so aggressive Mikey. I haven't said anything, yet."

Michael rolled his eyes. Brian had dragged him to Woody's once more. Not that he complained, but he wanted to be somewhere where David wasn't, and Woody's was obviously not this place.

After a certain time in the bar, Michael was more relaxed and had forgotten David's presence in the same room. Michael could say anything about Brian, but he was always there when Michael needed.

The were going to get out of the bar when Brian decided he needed to go to the toilets. Fine. But David went to talk to him. That's not fine.

"You really dislike him, don't you ?" Michael said.

"Yes, I can't, but anyway." David answered. "How are you ?" He asked. Michael wondered if he was asking because he was truly concerned or to have his conscious clear.

"Guess." Michael answered. And then he thought it was the perfect time to ask, because he really didn't want to talk to his ex after that. "How did you get that ?" He pointed at David bruises on his face.

"Guess ?" David answered, smirking a little. Michael stared at him, his eyes saying really David, really ? "It's Ben."

Michael tried to suppress a laugh, not quite successfully and ended up giggling. "Seriously ?"

"That doesn't look serious to you ?" David answered to his rethorical question.

"I know but... why ?"

David laughed, not even trying to hide it. What was so funny ?

"You're blind Michael." David said, but in a kind tone, which made the thing a bit strange. "Look, I..."

Michael saw Brian coming back to him as the perfect time to go, Brian was saving him from David's apologies. "have to go." he completed.

"Goodbye." He heard Brian say and David turned to walk back to his seat.

"What did he want ?" Brian asked when they were out if Woody's.

"Nothing. Ben punched him."

"Oh, aggressive little brother." Brian looked amused, and a little impressed.

Thursday.

_How can David's classes be so boring when they were so interesting before ? _Michael thought. He had to find a solution, because this was not just happening because it was David's class, it was a general thing. He had to find a way to be interested in something again.

"So, I wish you to have great holidays, and good luck for the exams." David smiled and everyone started to pack their things.

"Michael." David called him before he could run out. _What again ?_

"What ?" He turned to face his still-gorgeous-ex-boyfriend-professor.

"You forgot your scarf last time." David said, handing the black scarf to Michael.

"Oh... Thanks." Michael took the scarf and looked at his watch, though he knew what time it was. "I have class."

"Sure, go." David replied. "And Michael I..." He said as Michael was turning to the door.

"Stop." Michael interrupted. "Don't...- just don't." and he went out of the class. His head was a mess again, as if everyone wanted to make him feel bad. Why couldn't he be left alone ?

And at this very moment, just as if God hated him, his phone vibrated in his pocket. He looked at it to find a text from Ben.

'Are you avoiding me ? ~ Ben'

What did Ben want him to answer ? No ? But the fact that he was avoiding Ben was obvious. He hadn't met him for lunch the whole week, he hadn't texted him or even talked to him. . Answering no would be like saying Ben he's an idiot. And he was so not.

But he couldn't answer yes neither, because he would have to say why, and he didn't want to hurt Ben by saying I want to be alone; or to embarrass him and compromise their friendship by saying you're confusing me. So he didn't answer. Better passing for rude than saying something false or something he wasn't sure about.

Friday.

'I'm going to New York for the holidays, staying with my Uncle Vic. See you after.'

Michael pressed send and the text was gone to be received by Ben's phone. He knew Ben wouldn't like it, and he would worry. But Michael really had to rest and think somewhere far from here. He would be back two weeks later.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

January 2nd

* * *

**~ Michael ~**

* * *

"Ma I'm home !" Michael shouted from the doorway of his house. He heard hurrying footsteps above his head and a moment later, his mother was running down the stairs.

"Honey you're back." She exclaimed and immediately pulled her son in a hug. "How are you ?" She asked when she eventually stepped back.

"Honestly, fine. Much better than when I left."

"Good." She smiled. "I was just about to make dinner. Come sit with me at the table and tell me all about it."

Michael crossed the living room and sat down at the kitchen table, opposite to his mother.

"Tell me, how was New York ? And Vic ?" She asked excitedly.

"You know you've called me like every day ?" Michael replied with a roll of his eyes.

"I'm your mother, and I wanted to know you safe. Now answer me."

"Fine. New York was fantastic. Spending New Year's Eve there was something I'm glad I've experienced." Michael smiled. Yes, he was glad to have spent his holidays in New York, even if the reasons why he went there were quite sad. "I spent a lot of time with Uncle Vic. And Mark is quite nice."

"Who is it ?" She exclaimed loudly.

"Uncle Vic's new boyfriend."

"Since when ?"

"A little time before I arrived."

"And why am I the last one to know ?" She asked in a tone of reproach.

"Uncle Vic was afraid you would yell on the phone and break every New Yorker's eardrum." Michael replied with a little smile.

"I'll tell him what I think !" She said, trying to sound offended but she couldn't help the smile on her face. Michael chuckled. It looked like they were going to play cat and mouse again. "And how about yours ?" She asked. Oh great, she always had the right sentence to ruin the atmosphere.

"My what ?" Michael asked, playing dumb.

"Boyfriend, silly." She replied.

"David and I are not together anymore." Michael said. Saying it out loud was not painful anymore. well, not as much. Knowing that he wasn't good enough to keep his boyfriend would still be painful for a long time.

"I just wanted to know if it was clear for you." She explained.

"It is."

"Good... So have you had fun with some New York guy ?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Haa no."

"Why ?" What the hell ? Was it her business ? Uh no.

"Why should I ?"

"It's not that you should; but you're young, there are plenty more fish in the sea."

"I'm aware of the fish in the sea."

"What I'm saying is that to be able to move on, you need more of a conversation than just yelling at each other."

"I know."

* * *

January 4th

_Alright, you can't postpone this anymore. You need to man up._

And after having told himself one last time that this was nothing he couldn't do, Michael got out of his house. He took the path to David's house like he used to. He was really going to do this, having a calm and mature conversation about his feelings. Awkward.

He couldn't hide from David any longer, that was not a mature and adult thing to do, even if he wanted to. Because even if he was fine now, there was still a part of his heart that hurt at the thought, or the sight of David. At the thought that he had a boyfriend, but somehow he wasn't good enough, he wasn't worth it.

Michael jumped as he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out of his pocket and pressed it against his ear. "Hello ?"

"Hey Mikey ! What are you doing today ?"

"Hi Bri, I'm going to speak to David."

"Why ?"

"Because I have to give a proper ending to our relationship. It's the right thing to do."

"You sure you won't fall for him again ?" Brian asked, concern is his voice.

"I'm sure." Michael replied.

"And what if the bro is here ?"

"Oh shiiiit, I didn't even think of that." _Shit, I can't deal with talking to David and to Ben at the same time, on the same day. One at a time was enough. They live in the same house idiot, what did you expect ? _"What am I going to do ?" He sighed.

"Well, don't tear off his clothes if he's here, that could be a little counterproductive."

"I don't want to tear off his clothes !" Michael exclaimed. He blushed when the thought crossed his mind, it was not the time to fantasize.

"That's not what you told me." Brian replied, and Michael could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Yes, but… but no." Michael mumbled.

"That's clear."

"Yeah."

"What's the problem ?"

"I'm going there to talk to David."

"What's the problem ?" Brian repeated. Michael sighed. He really couldn't hide anything from Brian.

"Starts with a 'J' and ends with 'ulia.'"

"And ?"

"I thought this was a good enough explanation." Michael replied. "But… what am I even talking about here ? I'm going to talk to David."

"Sure. I'm the voice of your conscience Mikey, you can't hide from the truth."

"Yeah, well the voice of my conscience will have to shut up because I'm there."

Brian laughed before saying "See you Mikey." and hanging up.

Michael put his phone in his pocket and looked up. There he was. In front of that gorgeous house once more. He took a deep breath, walked to the front door and knocked. He waited for a minute without any sign of activity coming from the house. He was starting to think there was no one home when the door opened.

Of course.

What had he done to God to deserve that ?

It had to be Ben.

"Michael !" Ben said, surprised. A dazzling smile immediately appeared on his lips. The smile that made Michael's heart flutter. He wouldn't admit it, but he had missed that smile.

"Hi." He replied, smiling a little.

"Uh… well, come in." Ben said, stepping back to let Michael enter.

"Thanks." Michael replied as he entered the house. Ben closed the door and turned to Michael. "Well, you know the house." He said, gesturing towards the living room.

"So..." Michael started when they had reached their destination. "I wanted to talk to David, is he here ?"

"No, he's not here. Professors' meeting before the beginning of the classes." Ben explained.

"On a Sunday ?"

"Professors are weird people."

"Oh, yeah right. Happy New Year by the way." Michael said.

"Happy New Year to you as well." Ben replied and they smiled at each other. There was a moment of silence where they were just looking at each other before Ben spoke.

"Michael... can I ask you something ?"

Michael looked questioningly at him. "Sure."

"Did I do something wrong ?" He asked. "I mean, we were getting along so well, and then you started avoiding me and you stopped talking to me. So did I do something to offend you ? Because if I did, I'm sorry."

"What ? No, of course not." Michael reassured Ben.

"Why then ?"

"I... I guess I had a hard time dealing with the break-up." Michael answered. Big fat liar. But no, it wasn't a total lie after all, he really had a hard time.

"I could have been there for you. That's what friends do." Ben argued.

"You had other things to do... Like punching your brother." Michael said jokingly.

Ben laughed. "Yes, right, that kept me pretty busy."

Ben asked Michael if he wanted something to drink and Michael said that he was fine. They sat on the couch and talked about random things like they used to; losing all track of time, just like before, like the good old times. Michael had even forgotten why he came here in the first place.

"No, you're not going to hear me sing." Michael protested when Ben said he surely had a beautiful voice.

"Why not ?"

"Do you randomly ask people to sing ?" Michael asked, teasing.

"No, only you."

"Come on, if I ever was to sing, it would be the apocalypse. Like 15 days of raining non-stop. We could not get out of the house."

Ben chuckled. "I could live with that. No classes, no worries, no outside world... sing please."

"Haha not in a million years." Michael replied. "Come to think of it, I thought you weren't going to be there; thought you would be spending time with your girlfriend for the last days of holidays."

"Oh... uh..." Ben said, trying to find his words. "I guess I never had a chance to tell you... Julia and I broke up."

"Oh, I'm sorry." Michael said. Yes, he was sorry. He was. He had to be. He was concerned but mostly curious.

"What happened ?"

"Among other things, she thought that I was spending too much time with you and not enough with her." Ben looked away for a few seconds and took a deep breath. Michael stayed quiet, feeling that the main reason was about to come. "And she thought I was attracted to you."

Wow. _Wow_. This couldn't be possible. The man had had a girlfriend two weeks after his arrival; that didn't leave room for doubt. But if Julia thought it was big enough to break-up... The best way, and the only way to know was to ask the person in front of him.

"And... a-are you ?" Michael whispered, biting his bottom lip.

Ben seemed to think about it for a second but didn't answer. He looked in Michael's eyes and leaned forward hesitantly, pressing his lips lightly on Michael's.

Michael's heart skipped a beat, or maybe two, as he realized what was happening. Ben was kissing him, soft and sweet, and he was kissing back. Their lips moved against each other in a slow rhythm. It was a whole new sensation, and it was wonderful. Michael's heart fluttered with happiness.

After a moment, Ben pulled away and waited for Michael to say something.

"Wow." Michael eventually said, when he had calmed enough to retrieve the ability to speak. "Is that a yes ?" He asked with a little smile.

"I... guess." Ben replied, blushing. And Michael litteraly couldn't help but lean forward to steal another kiss, just to verify it was really real, really happening. This time, Michael rested a hand on Ben's cheek and Ben put a hand at the back of Michael's neck.

"Perfect, it's the icing on the cake."

They jumped in surprise at the voice; voice that without any doubts, belonged to David.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: **** Ben ~**

"Oh my god." Michael said, jumping from the couch, his eyes wide from surprise.

"What a pleasure seeing you here Michael." David said in a snarky tone.

"I-I came here to talk to you."

"Obviously." David was being ironical and he seemed calm but Ben knew him well enough to see that he was sad, even heartbroken.

Ben couldn't really think, he was still high from kissing Michael. He just wanted to stay seated on the couch and smile because it had been perfect. Well, until two minutes ago.

"I should go." Michael said, beginning to walk, or run to the door.

"I think so." David replied just as Ben said "I'll come with you."

"No need, I can walk." Michael said, already passing the threshold.

Ben grabbed his coat and his keys and stepped outside of the house. He looked around him and finally saw Michael crossing the street. What he also saw very well was the car driving much faster than the speed limit allowed. And Michael wasn't paying attention. He began to run and yell but it was already too late. He saw the car hit the man he loved. The car didn't waste time to disappear after that. Huh _Loved _? Too panicked to think on what he had just admitted to himself, Ben knelt beside Michael, unconscious in the middle of the road.

"Call the fucking emergency." Ben shouted.

Ben saw blood on the ground but didn't know where it came from.

He tried to remember what he had learnt about first aid. What to do first when you witness an accident ? Come on, calm down, think, what to do ? Right so, first check if he's responding. No, he's not moving. Is he breathing ? Ben lowered his head to try to hear some breathing but couldn't hear anything. Michael's chest wasn't rising and falling either. Oh my God he's not breathing. what do I do next ? 'If the victim is not breathing, start a CPR.' He remembered the nurse.

30 pumps, 2 breaths. Ben placed his hands and began pumping. _1, 2, 3, 4, please live, 5, 6, 7, please live, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12_. At 30, he blew air two times in Michael's mouth and saw his chest rising. He repositioned himself before starting another 30 pumps.

"They're on their way." A familiar voice said. Ben recognized it but didn't have time to name it and associate with the person.

_1, 2, 3, 4, 5._

"Are you qualified ?" Someone in the crowd said in a suspicious tone.

"Of course not." Ben snapped, not losing the count.

_6, 7, 8._

"Then why are you doing it ?" The person asked, like it was unbelievable to do a such thing.

_9,10,11_

"It's called first aid, you moron !" Ben shouted angrily.

_12,13,14,15,16_

Ben heard the siren of the ambulance and thanked god they came so fast.

_17,18,19,20,21_

"It's okay, we have him now." A doctor said a short moment later, kneeling beside him.

But it wasn't okay. "22, 23, 24." He was counting out loud now.

"Sir, I need you to step back so you can do what we've been called for."

"Man, come on, let them." A man put his hands above Ben's and guided them away from Michael's body.

The doctors, two men and a woman immediately took things in hand. They said a lot of things that only doctors could understand. There were some noises and some bips but Ben couldn't look at what they were doing. Ben managed to catch a question addressed to him.

"What happened ?" One of the doctors, the woman asked.

"A car... it was driving really fast and... then he was lying on the floor."

"Did you move him ?"

"No."

"Did you know first aid ?"

"Yes."

"Good. You may have saved his life." she said, giving him a light reassuring smile.

The two men began to count to three and they gently lifted to put him on a stretcher.

"We transfer him to hospital. You're coming with us." She continued.

"O-okay." Ben replied. His body was beginning to shake and he could hardly breathe.

"Let's get you in the car." The man who had taken his hands earlier said while pushing him gently towards the ambulance.

Once they were in, seated to Michael attached securely to the stretcher, the man spoke again.

"Look at me, I know this is scary but in hospital they will do the best they can to save your friend. You've already helped him a lot."

"Who a-are you ?" Ben asked.

"I'm a doctor. Now I want you to focus on your respiration and to take a few slow, deep breaths." Ben did as he was told, and his body slowly stopped shaking.

"Good, that's good." The man said. "Continue."

A few minutes later, the ambulance stopped and there was a rush to get Michael out of it and into hospital.

Ben was asked a few things, including the name and number of any member of Michael's family and some information about him. He then made a few phone calls. And after that began the long wait.

After 10 minutes to wait, the man from earlier entered the waiting room.

"I had to make a phone call. Family was waiting to eat diner." He handed Ben a cup of coffee he had in hand. "Coffee ?"

"No thanks, I'm already too nervous." Ben replied, shaking his head. "Go back to your family then; why are you still here ?"

"Thought you could use a little support. And they can wait; my mother and aunt were already asking me about my love life." He joked. "My name is William by the way." He smiled, reaching out his hand. Ben looked up. He hadn't really had the time to observe to man before. He was quite good-looking, about the same height as Ben, curly brown hair, green-grey eyes (A coulour between green and grey) and stubble on his chin.

"Ben." Ben replied, shaking Williams' hand.

William seemed to think of something for a moment. "Are you Julia's neighbour by any chance ?" William asked. Ben's eyes went wide in surprise and he frowned.

Now he knew. The familiar voice was her. She called the hospital.

"Uh... yeah ?" he replied, inviting the other man to continue.

"So you're the Ben she's been talking about. Not lately though."

"I guess it's me, and you are ?"

"I'm her cousin." Oh

"Oh, okay. Why did I not see you before ?"

"I lived in New York but I really wanted to change. Yeah who wants to change city when they live in New York huh ? I must be a weird guy. I first came here for the wedding and I liked it here. Plus I have some of my family here." He explained. "So now I live here."

Holy shit, the wedding. Ben felt awful, he hadn't forgotten about that but he couldn't go or ask if it went well. He hadn't dared talk to her after their break up.

"How was it ? The wedding." Ben asked.

"It was great, very beautiful, she was-"

"What the hell happened ?" David interrupted, entering the waiting room.

"I told you on the phone, David if you had listened. Or were you too busy ?"

"He has been hit by a car but your brother knew the first aid so he kept his heart beating until the ambulance arrived." William explained, standing up.

"Oh, okay. Sorry to have interrupted you." It was not like him to apologize.

"Anyway, William Archer." He smiled.

"David Cameron." David replied. They shook hands.

"Well... I should go now, it was nice to meet you." He said. "Uh... I mean, not nice but"

"I know what you mean." David gave him a little smile.

"I guess I'll say you around." William said to both of them before leaving. David sat down on a chair next to Ben.

"Calm down." They heard a minute later.

"Calm down ? My son is seriously injured, I don't know if he'll be fine, so no I won't calm down."

Brian and Debbie came into the waiting room and looked at the two brothers.

"What did you do ?" Debbie asked to David.

"Excuse me ?" David frowned.

"What did you do to make my son run away ?"

"What makes you think I did something ?"

"He was coming to your house to talk to you."

"I wasn't there." David replied, glancing at his brother.

Brian laughed. "That's so cliché."

"What ?" Debbie asked him.

"Oh nothing." Brian smirked.

* * *

They were all sitting in the waiting room. Ben felt like a stranger there, like he didn't belong there, with Michael's family. There was his mother, his best friend, even his ex-boyfriend, and what was he ? The I-kissed-you-once guy ?

The tic-tac of the clock was driving him crazy. Why did it have to be so loud ? Was it God's way of telling him 'look at what you've done' ?

Paying attention to David'a and Brian's was too much to him and he decided to concentrate on what he would do once Michael would wake up.

Nothing could be simple. There was always something to complicate the good things that happened to him. But this time he was going to simplify everything because the one thing he knew was that he didn't want to stay away from Michael, not anymore. They would talk, Michael would get better, and they would maybe even go out sometime. Everything was going to be fine.

Ben was pulled out of his reverie by a voice saying something he definitely wanted to pay attention to.

"Yes, the surgery went fine. He's in intensive care now, he should wake up soon."

"Thank god! So he's going to be fine ?" Debbie asked.

"We'll have to wait until he wakes up to be really sure."

"Can we see him ?"

The doctor nodded. "He'll have to get a lot of rest and sleep to recover so don't tire up and don't bother him with bad news or shocking news if there are any." he explained, gesturing for them to follow him to Michael's room.

They took the elevator to the second floor and walked in the hallway to finally stopped in front of a door at the end.

"When he wakes up, call a nurse immediately. We will need to verify certain things." They entered the room where Michael was lying on the bed. He had a big bandage around his head and a few bruises on his face. He had a cast on his right arm. "He has a pretty severe a traumatic brain injury; he must have hit his head hard on the ground. Luckily, if I dare say so, he doesn't have any other serious injury. Except a broken forearm." The doctor explained.

"How long is he going to stay here ?" Brian asked.

"It depends on how well he recovers. Tell us if you notice something unusual when he wakes up."

"Unusual like what ?" Ben asked, frowning.

They heard a groan coming from Michael's bed and realized he was waking up.

"Hi honey ! How are you ? Do you know how worried I was ? I always tell you to look to see if there are cars coming before crossing the street, but you're too stubborn and-"

"And then she dies from lack of oxygen." Brian joked. "I'll be shorter; hey Mikey."

Michael opened his eyes. "Hey." He replied weakly.

"Here, drink." Debbie ordered and he took a few sips of the glass she was holding for him.

"He can speak." The doctor stated.

"You were afraid he couldn't ?" Brian asked, surprised.

"We prefer not to assume anything."

Michael looked at the people around and he seemed confused when he saw Ben.

"What you doing here ?" He began, his voice still weak, but able to form a sentence. "said you had to help Julia with the wedding."

"What ?" Ben exclaimed. He was stunned. Was Michael being delirious ?

Michael's gaze went to David and he smiled. David was as surprised as Ben was. Why wasn't he remembering they had broken up ? And then something lit up in Ben's mind.

"Unusual like what ?" Ben asked again to the doctor who was now taking notes in Michael's file.

"Loss of memory." The doctor stated. Dear God no. "Michael." He called. "Michael, please stay awake one more minute."

Michael groaned and open his eyes with difficulty.

"What day is it today ?"

"Dunno." Michael replied.

"Please, think about it, try to concentrate. What day is it ?"

"Uh... November 25th ? 26th ?"

The doctor frowned and nodded.

"That's it. You can go to sleep now." He said. Michael fell asleep as soon as his eyes closed again.

November 25th ? But it was nearly two months ago. Everyone stood there gaping.

"He doesn't know what is today's date. So he searched in his memory for the latest thing he remembers, which is something from November 25th." The doctor finally explained.


	14. Chapter 14

**I don't know so much about amnesia but it's fictional so let's say it works this way :)**

**Edit: my rhythm is completely messed up with this story, sorry. I'm lacking of inspiration x)**

* * *

**Chapter 14**

**- Michael -**

Michael woke up briefly a few times in the next days. He was welcomed by the worried faces of his family. Even David seemed tensed, like he was trying to be someone he wasn't.

After a few days sleeping, Michael could stay awake for some time and speaking. He was quickly tired and speaking tired him even more but the worst was that he couldn't remember how he had ended up in hospital. He had really tried. He had tried until his head physically hurt. He knew he shouldn't; the doctor had told him not to force but it was frustrating. Maybe David would know. He had to have been with him before the accident because it had happened nearhis house.

Michael opened his eyes and immediately saw David sitting next to him staring at someone in front of him.

"David?" He said and David looked at him.

"Yes?" David replied. Michael knew him; he knew his smile was forced. But why? _Isn't he happy to see me? _

"Tell me what happened again?"

"Why?"

"Because I want to know."

"You were hit by a car."

"But why? I'm always careful."

"I don't know Michael!" David exclaimed. He looked sad. Sad and hurt. But he quickly put back his smile. "Don't worry about it." he said, resting his hand on Michael's. "Now you just have to rest."

Michael turned his head just when Brian came into the room. "Hey Mikey! How are you today?" He looked at David and their hands on the bed. "And how is your _boyfriend?_" Brian said the last word like it was going to burn his tongue, or physically hurt him.

"I'm perfect." Michael scorned. "And my boyfriend is too stubborn to answer me."

"What's your question?" Brian asked.

"It's about the accident." David replied, shooting a... warning look at Brian? Since when David was speaking to Brian without being forced to? Had they some sort of plan. Like plotting behind my back.

"I hope you're listening because it will be the one and only time I'll say this..." Brian took a pause, sighing dramatically. "I think he's right."

Michael laughed. Or he tried to, at least; he ended up coughing. He was too tired for that. But it sure was the thing he was certain he would never hear.

"Why?" Michael asked.

"Sleep." Brian ordered.

Michael didn't want to sleep. He couldn't believe he had just crossed the street in front of a car. He should believe it. Everyone could make a mistake after all. He could have forgotten to look around. It was absolutely possible. But for whatever reason, Michael knew there was something else. And the more the days passed, the more it was bothering him. Thinking was so tiring.

* * *

**- Ben -**

It was about week now that Michael was in that "state". Ben couldn't stay with him all the time. With the classes and homeworkers, but he tried his best. What hurt him the most was seeing David acting like a true boyfriend with Michael. He had even kissed him. Like what the hell? If Michael had been himself, he would have punched David instead of kissing him.

Michael didn't sleep that much anymore. He was getting his strength back and his injuries were healing well. The only problem was his head. They didn't know what to do. And Ben was convinced that pretending wasn't a solution on the long term. It reminded him of the conversation they had had with Michael's doctor.

_"The memories are still there somewhere. You just need to find a way to make them come back." The doctor had said. _

_"But what can we do?" Ben had asked. They just couldn't stay there doing nothing._

_"Don't shock him. I think I understood you two had broken up." The doctor had replied, gesturing toward Ben and David had laughed._

_"Oh no, they" Ben pointed at David "broke up."_

_"But..." The doctor had frowned but hadn't finished his sentence. «Well, obviously he doesn't remember that, so don't tell him too abruptly."_

_"Do we have to tell him at all?" David had asked._

_"Of course!" Ben had replied and David had shot him an annoyed look._

_"I wasn't talking to you." _

_"And I was answering to you." _

_"You just want him to know that because you think he'll come back to you." David had said, laughing at his own joke. _

_"Oh please, he's not an object you can control."_

_"Neither can you. Stop being so selfish." _

_"I am selfish? I am selfish? It's the pot calling the kettle black!" Ben had exclaimed and this had earned him a few glances from the _

_"Calm down, calm down." The doctor had said when the brothers were ready to yell at each other._

* * *

Another day in hospital. But this time, Ben and David were thinking the same. "We will tell him." They would try to say it carefully; not just "he cheated in you." Or "I love you."

They entered the room and Michael noticed something on their faces.

"What is going on?" Michael asked.

"We have something to say to you." David said.

"That sounds scary." Michael chuckled.

"Michael..." David started again. But a knock on the door made him stop talking. They turned their head to see who was coming. Julia, it was a real surprise. And followed by the man who had helped Ben the day of the accident, William. Yes, he had said he was Julia's cousin after all.

"Hello." Julia said.

"Hi." Michael said and he looked at William. Ben smiled at her and David...was smiling a little too, but not at her.

"Oh I'm sorry, how rude of me." William started. "I'm William Archer." He said to Michael who nodded. "I'm glad you're fine, I left before you woke up, but I would have introduced myself sooner."

* * *

**- Michael -**

"Were you there when the accident happened?" Michael asked. Maybe this man could tell him something.

"Yes, I was but I didn't do much, he had the situation under control." The man, William replied.

"Who?"

"Ben." He said, pointing at Ben. _What?_

"What did he do?"

"He saved you." William explained and Michael started to understand.

"Did you?" Michael said to Ben, his big brown impressed eyes directed at him. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"What will it change? You're alive; it's the only important thing." Ben replied.

Then there was a moment of silence, except for David and William speaking. Michael couldn't hear what they were saying but it seemed like they got along well.

And Michael saw Ben looking at Julia and Julia looking at Ben and it was really awkward. What kind of a couple were they?

"You know, for a couple you are acting really weird." Michael said. It was meant to be a joke but Julia turned to him like he had said something out of place.

"Oh no, Ben and I broke up." Julia explained and Ben suddenly looked alarmed.

One memory came back to Michael's mind with that sentence_. "Julia and I broke up." _Ben had said that to him. And the others memories came back one by one. The kiss, David, the car.

Michael looked at all of them with wide eyes.


End file.
